Something More
by Queen of the Sugarplum Fairies
Summary: Ten years after the defeat of Myotismon, Matt is married to Sora. But when Mimi returns to Odaiba for a digidestined reunion, what can happen? How much can change? Will ghosts from the past come back to life?
1. Reunion

This is set AFTER the last episode of season two. In this story (unlike every other I have written) I sort of recognise what those crazy writers say happened. Of course, that doesn't mean I can't change it later. Which, naturally, I shall.

Disclaimer: I do not own anything. At all. Please don't sue me. I mean, it's hardly worth your time. All you're gonna get out of me is a star sticker, a pencil and if you are EXTREMELY lucky, half a chocolate bar.

**Reunion**

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Mimi Tachikawa surveyed the scene from her position at the doorway. She almost didn't want to enter. But what would be the point of coming all the way from New York to Odaiba if she bailed now?

Closing her fists in determination, she noticed that her left hand felt oddly empty. Almost always that hand had her son's own tiny hand closed in it. Her two year old, Jamie. The man in her life. The single only person she could trust. But he wasn't here tonight. He was at home, being babysat. Mimi felt like a part of her was missing.

Her dress swayed slightly in the draught. Tai had wanted formal for this reunion. Ten years since Davis and the gang had finally defeated Myotismon. Felt like fifty. Mimi was wearing a long pink strapless satin dress. Tulle under the skirt made it stick out a little way, and diamantes traced the neck and hemlines. Her waist length chestnut hair was pulled up in a loosely pinned messy bun.

Mimi bit her glossed lip, and her fingers began playing with the silver and diamond choker around her neck. She couldn't do this. She had to leave. She was just about to flee when Yolei spotted her.

"Mimi! Is that really you? You look fabulous!"

Yolei hadn't lost any of her vocal ability. The purple haired woman left Ken's side and rushed over to where Mimi was now stuck uncertainly to the spot. She was trapped now. She had to live out the night. That was her goal. Live to see morning's light. Breathe, Mimi, just breathe. Yolei was balancing a baby on her hip. It couldn't have been more than five months old. Yolei herself seemed to glow. She was dressed in a black ball skirt and a dark red bodice. Mimi smiled slightly. Always a good idea to wear dark colours around young babies. She remembered that all too well.

As should Yolei, really. This was her third kid. Mimi wondered where the other two were.

As if hearing her thoughts, Yolei said, "Oh, Michaela and Reece are with Ken's mother tonight. They love staying with their grandmother. But I just couldn't leave Erin. She needs to be with mummy."

Yolei had married Ken the day after she had turned eighteen, and they'd had Michaela, their first child, nine months later. Reece was born a year and a half later, and now they had little Erin. Ken was head of some extremely influential company that Mimi couldn't remember the name of. He often had to go on business trips, but he refused to ever be away for the weekend. He claimed he had to return to his loving wife and wonderful kids, and that they were so much more important than his job could ever be. Mimi smiled. Those two had just been meant to be. Not like herself and another digi-destined.

While Yolei chattered on, Mimi found herself scanning the room. There were TK and Kari, Kari looking lovely in a white chiffon dress with long flared sleeves. They were together as always. Engaged, in fact. Kari had the diamond band around her ring finger. TK had spent a whole two years worth of savings on that ring. He'd wanted his love to have the best. Mimi looked down at her own hands. Nothing. He'd always said he'd marry her one day. But that was before.

TK was at university studying to be a journalist. He had the promise of a job at a high prestige newspaper on graduation. Kari was the same uni doing a design course majoring in photography. She was coming top of her year, but she didn't care. She was only there to be close to TK.

Davis was standing nearby, rearranging his Armani suit. Mimi couldn't help grinning as he watched TK jealously. Davis had started his 'Noodles, Noodles, Come Get Your Noodles!' cart four years ago. Then it had been a small, localised business, and Davis had to run everything himself. Nobody would have guessed that now it would be an international, multi-million dollar corporation. Davis had everything. A penthouse apartment with the best view in the city, complete with spa and swimming pool, a special edition Ferrari, and a ski lodge in Aspen.

Well, almost everything. The only thing he really wanted was tied to TK. Poor Davis had never been able to understand why Kari had chosen a guy with only half a degree and a hundred dollars to his name, over a millionaire who could give her anything she could desire.

Mimi's eyes continued to scan. They rested on Izzy, Joe and Cody. The three men, all dressed in identical suits, were standing near the bar, laughing. Izzy was another hugely successful member of the group. He had modelled a system that linked the Digiworld to the real world when he was sixteen. Then at eighteen went to work for the Relations with the Digiworld sector of the UN. Now he was head of that department, and an obscenely powerful young man. Joe was, as everybody had expected, a doctor. He worked for Odaiba hospital, and regularly performed miracles. He was dating a nurse named Amelia, and it was rumoured that he was going to propose to her. Cody was a barrister. One of the best in the region. He was very highly sought after, and because of this, very wealthy. He was still short, but nobody noticed any more.

Moving on, she saw Tai. Standing with Sora and Matt. Good old Tai. Always the dramatic one, he was dressed in tails, complete with top hat and cane. He was a diplomat. Who'd have guessed? After being identified as the leader of the original digi-destineds, he had been offered the job. He'd had to cut his hair though. The currently held belief was that old hairstyle had got stuck in the door on his first day, and it had needed a trim so that he could fit through the doorframe.

Nearby was Sora. Mimi had to admit that her old best friend was looking great. She was wearing a midnight blue velvet dress. She was a part time tennis instructor, and spent the rest of the time taking care of her child. Ben. He was about the same age as her own son. They could be good friends. Yeah, right.

And standing there, his arm loosely wrapped around Sora's hips, was Matt. Damn that man. Damn him to hell. How could he do that to her? How could he have the nerve? He was a rock star, but it didn't mean he could treat ordinary people like dirt.

Mimi sighed as she looked back at herself. Everybody had been so successful in achieving their dreams. That is, everybody except her. Sure, she had money. Her dad was a millionaire, for goodness sake. But it wasn't enough. She'd wanted to be a movie star. Famous. One of the big celebrities of Hollywood. But she'd failed. What was she? A single parent. And a hostess for a cooking show. So what if her show was number two, right behind Jamie Oliver, in the ratings? It wasn't the same, and it never would be.

It had taken her five, long, back-breakingly hard years to land that job. It had only got worse after Jamie was born. She couldn't do that any more. She didn't have the strength. She wasn't able to struggle through the crowd of wannabe stars. What made her any better than them? Nothing, that's what. Most of them were younger, prettier and without her responsibilities. They didn't have a two-year-old to take care of. So why would anyone hire her over them? They wouldn't.

"Mimi? Mimi? Hello? You there?"

Mimi blinked a few times then smiled. "Sorry Yolei. Must have spaced a bit."

Yolei just grinned back. "It's okay. Come on, let's re-introduce you to everyone."

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Well there you have it. Okay, I realise there is no sign of a plot at this point in time, but give it time. It shall show itself soon enough. Anyways, please review and tell me what you thought. Should I continue? Should this fic be abandoned on the steps of some unsuspecting nuns? Your recommendation will be noted.

_Emma's useless facts about nothing in particular _

In the movie "The Wizard of Oz," Toto the dog's salary was $125 a week, while Judy Garland's was $500 a week.


	2. Moonlight Reflections

**Moonlight Reflections**

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Mimi drifted aimlessly around the room, champagne flute in one hand. What was she doing here? Why had she come back? There was nothing here for her. She'd thought that maybe there might be... but she'd been wrong.

She wandered out onto the balcony. Resting her hands lightly on the railing, she looked out across the city. So many memories.

She and Matt had never really spoken before they went to the Digiworld. She had seen him around the neighbourhood and the school, but had never thought to look twice at him. She'd had her group of friends, and he'd had his. The most they'd spoken was when he was playing in the band for the school musical, and she'd been playing one of the lead roles. And that was just about the weather.

But the unforgettable adventure in the Digiworld changed all that. They became great friends. They could talk about anything and everything. Nobody could believe that the lone wolf and the social butterfly were so inseparable, but they were. Maybe it was their differences that made them so close? All Mimi knew was that Matt was quiet and thoughtful, and she could trust him with her life and he would never let her down. Similarly, Matt knew that Mimi was the most fun person to be around, and possibly the only person on the planet who could make him enthusiastic about anything. And there never was a better listener, once she calmed down.

She wasn't sure when those feelings of friendship started deepening into something more. But suddenly she started seeing him in a different light. He was an excellent friend, but there was something else about him too. She started noticing all the different colours in the blue of his eyes. Every word he said went straight to her heart, as if it bypassed her ears. The slightest thing he did could make her smile.

It took her quite a long time to realise this feeling was love.

Luckily for her, her feelings for Matt were fully reciprocated. He loved her with all his heart. They started dating when they were about twelve. Most people didn't believe that what they felt was love – but they both knew differently. Age didn't matter.

Or, they thought they knew differently.

Then, typically, something had to happen to ruin her happiness. Her father had to move to America for his work. Something about a business franchise, or maybe a relocating sector. She didn't know. She didn't care. All it meant to her was that she was being ripped from the one she truly loved most. Nothing in this world is fair.

So she packed up and shipped off. Sure, she still talked to him on the phone all the time. Phone bills were just part of her parents' punishment for removing her from her happy life in Odaiba. But it was never the same.

Still, her mother had what Mimi liked to call her Tea Party Friends. They lived back in Japan, and she often flew out to see them. Mimi didn't care much what her mother and father did, except for when she was allowed to go back with them. It meant that every few months, she was able to see Matt again. It wasn't right, but it was as close as they could get.

She would spend the four or five days that each visit consisted of practically attached to him. They had to take advantage of the time they had. It was precious. If she arrived during his school term, he would fake illness to be with her. If he were supposed to have band practise, he would reschedule. He put his life on hold for her. They spent the time talking, and kissing, and talking more. As they grew older they explored certain things further than kissing. "I love you" was thrown around so often that Mimi and Matt were surprised if ten minutes went by without it being said.

Then one visit everything went as wrong as things could go. It was against her parents' wishes. They thought that she spent too much time in transit between Japan and America. They recommended she settle down and find herself a nice American boyfriend, and forget all about that Matt Ishida. This had angered Mimi beyond all rationality. In a rage, she had left the house and jumped on a plane. Looking back, Mimi supposed the trip was ill fated from the very start.

Mimi was twenty, Matt had just had his twenty-first birthday. Mimi had flown out to celebrate it with him. She had been a part of the huge surprise party that Tai and Sora had organised for him. That was when Tai and Sora were still together.

She could remember that party as clearly as if it had happened yesterday. It had been at Matt's house. Tai had taken him out for a few birthday drinks, and while they were out, all of Matt's friends had piled into his house. There were balloons and streamers and a cake the size of a coffee table. There was laughing and drinking and dancing. Tai's speech was something that to the day scarred her mind.

Mimi would never forget the look on his face as he walked through the door and they all yelled surprise. She would never forget how for the entire length of that party he had only had eyes for her.

She would never forget how Sora had left with Tai, leaving her without a ride or a place to stay the night. She would never forget the choices she made that night. She could have taken a taxi to a hotel. She could have called Kari or Yolei and asked to stay with them. She could have refused Matt's offer to stay with him that night. She could have refused his offer to see his new guitar, which lived in his bedroom.

She could have stopped at kissing and fondling. But that night, in Matt's bedroom, on his king-size bed with the blue quilt, she let Matt show her something more. Maybe it was the alcohol that made them make that choice. Maybe it was that they were still carried away by the excitement of the night. But whatever it was, it had left Mimi with a constant reminder.

Jamie.

Another day she would never forget was the day she found out she was pregnant. She had been seven weeks late. She was usually so regular. So she had visited her doctor. Blood was taken for testing. Three days later the doctor called her. She had wanted Mimi to come in to see her.

Mimi remembered that doctor's office as clear as day. It smelled a little like pine disinfectant. It was a pale yellow and white. The desk had three folders on it, and a box of tissues. The box of tissues has pictures of fluffy baby ducks on it. She remembered having to visit the bathroom to throw up she was so nervous. She didn't know at the time that this was partially due to morning sickness. She remembered sitting in the chair, in a daze, as the doctor told her the news.

"Mimi… you're pregnant."

Three words that shattered her world. Mimi felt as if she was on a cloud as everything crumbled away from her. Of course, deep down she had already known this. But to have it said to her sent her into a whirlwind of confusion and chaos. What was she going to do now?

She had hoped to get some help from Matt. He was the father, of course. But naturally, things couldn't happen that easily for her. When she had told Matt she was pregnant, the strangest look had passed over his face. One of sadness, pain and anger all mixed up together. Then he had turned away from her.

Seconds of silence had melted into minutes. Maybe even hours. They felt like hours to Mimi. Finally he turned back to face her.

"Mimi… I… I… maybe we shouldn't see each other any more. I'm… sorry."

Mimi remembered the sight of his back as he left her standing there. Alone. She fought back tears as she vowed to be a great mother without him. She would show him.

She hadn't gone back to Odaiba after that. She had received an invitation to Matt and Sora's wedding, but in a fit of sadness and rage she had torn it into little pieces and burned them. Besides, women in their third trimester weren't supposed to fly.

She still talked to Tai, Kari, Izzy and Joe on the phone regularly. When Kari came over to New York once for her photography, Mimi had spent a week with her. Occasionally Mimi even talked to TK. The way she reasoned it, it wasn't his fault that he was the younger brother to the greatest scum of the universe. You can choose your friends but you can't choose your family. And every time he spoke to her he spent the first ten minutes apologising for his brother's insensitivity. Mimi heard her unfavourable relations with Matt had been the cause of a rather large split in the Takashi-Ishida family.

But for some reason the whole situation had become quite obsolete. Naturally the scandal had reached its peak just as Sora and Matt were married, and Mimi was just about to give birth. Matt was quite the unpopular one. Sora too, but to a lesser extent. They were shunned. They were no longer accepted as true digi-destineds. Mimi, while not happy about this, was certainly not sad either. Matt deserved everything that came to him. And Sora was almost as bad. Stealing Matt just as soon as he was free. Her supposed best friend was just waiting for him. Mimi had trusted her with everything. She had told Sora first. Before even telling her parents. Still, it wasn't her fault Matt had become suddenly available.

Mimi would never forgive him for what he did to her and her unborn child. Ever.

Pausing momentarily to breathe in the cool, dark air, she turned to return to the reunion. Then she saw him. Blocking the exit was the man she least wanted to face. Matt. He moved aside, walking to one of the silvery chairs that sat out greeting the moon. She was free. She could go inside. She could get away from him.

So why wasn't she?

"So. Married to Sora, hey?" she asked, sitting in the matching chair.

"Yeah." He replied. He didn't face her. He couldn't look her in the eyes. She was back. And at the worst possible time. Why was fate so determined to screw his life up?

"Mind if I ask why?" Mimi probed his soul, looking for answers. She watched his profile as he stared out across the city lights. Turning her head she watched them too. They were so lovely as they danced in her eyes. She had forgotten how entranced she had been by them as a child.

Matt summoned up all his courage in order to answer as truthfully as he could. He owed her that much. "I got her pregnant. I didn't want the kid to have a childhood like mine. It's not fair."

"What?" Mimi asked. She was trying her hardest not to start shaking in a mix of anger, confusion and sadness.

Matt could tell there was something wrong. She was still calm, but it was a forced calm. He knew from the icy edge in that one word she had spoken. "Her child needed a dad." He replied.

This was the last straw for Mimi. She gave up all pretence of normality and said, her voice ringing with incredulity, "And mine didn't? Let me get this straight. You found out that I was pregnant, left me, hooked up with Sora and got her pregnant, then married her?"

Matt didn't know what to say, other than, "Yeah."

Mimi was taken aback by his honesty. She was expecting some hasty reasoning, an attempt at explaining the situation. But there was none. She looked down at her one of a kind, ridiculously expensive diamante studded pink stilettos. "So... why did you leave me?"

Matt finally turned to look at her. A strand of chestnut blonde hair curled down alongside her face as she stared at her feet. Damn, she was beautiful. "I did it for you. I thought I'd let perfect you and perfect Michael go off to have your perfect kid and live your perfect life together. You know, happily ever after. Without me as a complication."

Mimi blinked a few times, not sure if she had heard right. "What did you just say?"

Matt was confused. "Without me as a complication?"

Mimi shook her head. "No. Before that. Did you just say Michael was my child's father?"

Matt was even more confused. What was her point? Where was she going with this? "Yeah. So?"

Mimi inhaled deeply. He really didn't know. How could he not know? How was it physically possible? Everybody else knew, didn't they? How could he not? Even after all these years, how could he not? "Matt... Michael's gay. Didn't the perm tip you off? Him and his boyfriend Brian have been together for two years. Michael is my shopping partner. Nothing more."

Matt felt as if a bucket of icy water had been thrown at his face. This was a pretty major wake up call. All this time... all this time spent hating Michael for no reason. All this time spent in agony over setting Mimi free. But if Michael wasn't the father... "Then who is Jamie's dad?"

Mimi looked up at the stars. Through the clear night they seemed to wink at her. Twinkle, twinkle little star. "Matt," she whispered to nobody, her words drifting into the night. "My first. And only."

Matt couldn't speak or even move. A baseball bat could not have hit him harder than those five words. A bullet couldn't have pierced his skin with more viciousness. The verbal weapon spiralled straight to his heart. "You mean... I am the kid's father?" his voice was strained, unbelieving. "But we – I mean – one time!"

Mimi gave a half-hearted laugh. All those PE lessons he'd skipped were coming back to bite him in the butt. "Once is all it takes, hon."

This changed everything. All that had once been stable and secure was now being tossed in a whirlwind of turmoil. Matt's whole world was coming crashing down around his feet. What was he going to do now? What the hell was he supposed to do now?

"Um... I'm... sorry. Really Mimi. I never would have left if I'd known. Not to leave you to take care of a newborn by yourself. I only did what I thought was best for you. What I thought you wanted."

That's the only reason I do anything.

Mimi wanted to scream at him. Make him feel all the hurt she had been feeling for the last three years. But she couldn't. Something was holding her tongue in her mouth. And deep down, she knew what it was. She still had feelings for him.

"You didn't know." Was all she replied.

Matt was silent for a moment as he thought. What was going to happen now? "What do you want me to do now?"

"Haven't you done enough?" Mimi's tone was caustic and bitter. Nobody could have guessed that she was struggling so hard to keep her calm exterior about her. Nobody could have guessed that on the inside all she wanted to do was break down and cry.

"Mimi, I've done a lot of things in my life that I ain't proud of, but running away from my mistakes is not one of them. Let me help you Mimi. Tell me what you want me to do."

Mimi heard the change in his voice. He was giving up his pretences. She decided to drop hers too. Stop pretending not to care, and show how she really felt. "I know, Matt. You are a good person, deep down. But what can you do? Everything is... hopeless."

With that one last whispered word, Mimi stood. She turned from Matt and went back inside, intent on finding the open bar. What had happened to her champagne anyway?

Matt put his head in his hands and sighed. "Oh, Mimi… I'm so sorry."

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What did you think? I decided you needed to know now why Mimi hated Matt so much, so this was pretty much just a flashback chappy.

_Emma's useless facts about nothing in particular _

The electric chair was invented by a dentist.


	3. Golden Truths

Sigh. Time for the clichéd apology for taking so long to update. But seriously, my teachers have no hearts. The amount of work they give me. It is pure insanity. It's like they wait until you are the busiest a human can physically get, and then they decide it's time for a few more assessments. Oh, and they only count for 50 percent of your overall mark. Which means if you do badly, you are going to FAIL LIFE AND DIE A MISERABLE COLD DEATH WITH NO FRIENDS BECAUSE YOU HAD TO BECOME ONE OF THOSE PEOPLE WHO WADE AROUND IN SEWAGE LOOKING FOR THINGS PEOPLE HAVE ACCIDENTALLY FLUSHED. But other than that, it doesn't matter that much. As IF! (Can you tell I'm Queen of Hearts in the school production of Alice in Wonderland?)

**Golden Truths**

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Mimi wandered inside. She felt sick. She was going to be sick. Her world was spinning. She needed to sit down. She needed some alcohol. It was too much. Too much. It wasn't supposed to happen this way. This wasn't right. She was so confused.

She realised she was pacing and stopped. Then she realised she was hyperventilating. Her heart was beating faster than she had ever experienced before. It was fluttering in her chest. She truly felt sick. Her heart hurt. She had never been in as much pain, not even when she was giving birth. She felt like she was going to be faint if she didn't sit down. Eyes rapidly scanning the room, she saw the open bar.

Racing over almost as fast as she had run when Jamie had fallen off his tricycle the first time, Mimi reached the bar stool. She fell onto it, grabbed a champagne flute and drank all of the golden liquid in one go. She was reaching for another when Tai appeared beside her.

"Well, if it isn't Miss Tachikawa! How ya going Mi?

Mimi's toes were curled in so tight her foot was cramping, and her heart was still beating a thousand times to the second. "Peachy keen jellybean. How about you Tai?"

"Well, my best friend knocked up the only girl I ever loved, then married her. So all in all, I'm just fantastic." Tai's chipper mood broke as he slumped into the second bar stool and thudded his head on the wooden bar top.

Mimi threw the second dose of champagne down her throat. "Seems like we're united in our troubles then."

Tai, whose head was currently getting well acquainted with the bar, replied in a slightly muffled voice, "Are we now? Well then, I think that this news deserves some accompaniment. Ready to knock them dead on the dance floor?"

Mimi had just finished her third glass of champagne, and was grabbing for a vodka and orange. "I hope you're not being literal."

"Never. Certainly not in public."

Mimi slammed the empty vodka and orange glass down on the table. The alcohol was starting to affect her senses now. "Okay."

She accepted his offered arm and he escorted her to the dance floor. Mimi giggled, something that now only ever occurred when she was particularly tipsy. She could see TK dancing with Kari. They were very good, as he swirled and twirled and dipped her. She also saw Davis trying to cut in. TK was very tolerant. Mimi giggled some more. Davis was so silly. Didn't he know that you can't break up the meant to be? Silly Davis. Then Mimi saw Yolei and Ken dancing. They weren't as good as TK and Kari. Ken was too self-conscious. He was afraid to try any extravagant moves. Silly Ken.

Then she saw Matt and Sora dancing. She suddenly stopped giggling. She wanted to cry. She had never cried about losing Matt, but here, on the dance floor, with Tai wrapped around her, she just wanted to break down. Tai must have sensed her change in mood, or felt her shaking, or heard her muffled sobs. Whatever it was, he pulled her in tighter and held her as she cried into his chest. Sitting his chin on the top of her head, he murmured in a voice so low only she could hear it.

"Don't worry Mimi. Everything will work itself out soon. It has to."

Mimi continued to sniffle as she swayed with Tai across the shiny dance floor. Her view only allowed her to see Tai's shirt, and a small portion of his deep red tie, so she couldn't have known that Matt's eyes were following her wherever she went. She couldn't have seen Sora kick her partner quite hard in the shin to try and get his attention back.

After the dancing was over, Mimi was blindly escorted by Tai and Joe to a taxi because she was far too drunk to drive. As she tripped over her heels while piling into the backseat after Tai, she didn't see Matt run after her with her purse. She didn't see him as he stood at the side of the road after her cab drove off. She didn't see him waiting there, watching her car disappear, for nearly five minutes. She didn't hear his words, whispered after her into the early morning air.

"Mimi… you have no idea how much I still love you… I'll fix this. I promise you, I'll fix this."

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_Emma's useless facts about nothing in particular _

Our eyes are the same size from birth, but our ears and nose keep growing forever.


	4. Reminiscing and Recriminating

One thing that is VERY IMPORTANT to remember for this chapter is something said about Sora earlier. Chapter two I think. Because I'm betting you haven't read any of this story in AGES, I'll rewrite that important line here:

(Concerning Mimi's pregnancy) _"… Mimi had trusted her with everything. She had told Sora first. Before even telling her parents."_

**Reminiscing and Recriminating**

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Matt flopped onto his bed, kicking his good shoes off onto the thick carpeting. Sora was still in the shower. He could hear the water splashing and the faint sound of her painfully tuneless singing. He assumed she'd already looked in on Ben. While he usually did the good dad thing and double-checked, tonight he couldn't bring himself to even move. He couldn't get his mind off one thing.

He was the father. The father of Mimi's child. And he'd abandoned her.

How did everything manage to get itself so screwed up?

He remembered so clearly the day he'd found out that Mimi was pregnant. Of course, he hadn't believed it initially. But he couldn't forget. He'd just driven TK to his date with Kari and was at the mall, looking for a new guitar to add to his collection. There were two he'd really liked, one metallic blue and one silver. Unable to chose between them, and figuring he shouldn't make a decision on an empty stomach, he was heading for the Food Court when he'd run into Sora. She'd looked distracted and was chewing her lower lip slightly. He'd thought she'd needed some coffee, assuming this state of worry was due to some argument with Tai, and had invited her to join him.

Smiling a little, she'd accepted.

They had sat and drank coffee and ate chocolate cake for a while, talking about nothing in particular. Sora was still looking anxious, so he'd asked her what was on her mind.

He knew something big was weighing on her when she'd remained silent for a few minutes. Sora had loved to talk about her problems. She still did, when he thought about it. But eventually she had opened her mouth, all the while looking at the crumbs of chocolate cake on the table.

"Matt… I don't know how to tell you this… but… I've heard Mimi's pregnant."

He remembered suddenly feeling very dizzy. Of course, he and Mimi wanted children one day, but he hadn't expected any for quite a while Things were going to get very complicated. He'd have to marry her much sooner than he'd thought. They'd both wanted to wait until she was a famous movie star and his rock band had hit the big time. And there were their parents to think of. His father would be disappointed, but nothing compared to Mimi's parents. They didn't even like the idea of Mimi dating him, let alone having his child. Matt could foresee great difficulties. Still, once the initial shock had worn off he had become almost accepting of the idea.

It had taken him a while to realise Sora had more to say.

"And… this is really hard, Matt… just understand it's only what I've heard… it might not be true, but… the father is Michael."

Matt had honestly felt his heart break. He felt it shatter into a thousand pieces as Mimi danced on them in her favourite pink stilettos. He'd thought they were in love. She had said that she was in love with him. He felt so betrayed. He wished he could be angry, but there was only enough space in his body for deep hurt and sadness. How could she do such a thing?

It couldn't be true. He wouldn't believe it. Mimi would never do that to him.

He'd left Sora with the bill to pay.

He knew she had to be mistaken. She must have heard wrong. People loved to make vicious rumours. They always did. That had to be it.

He was able to keep fooling himself until Mimi herself had flown over to talk to him. When she had said she was pregnant, admitted openly to it, his heart, now so fragile, had fallen apart again. The hurt was so much worse because this time it was mingled with disappointment. He'd been so sure, so absolutely certain Sora had been wrong. Now that Mimi had said it herself, he did what he was sure she had been asking for. He'd let her go. To show he wasn't going to get all possessive and refuse to give her up to the man she obviously wanted. It had been like hot knives through his soul to say those words to her. Those words that he could never forget. Those words that plagued his nightmares.

"_Mimi… I… I… maybe we shouldn't see each other any more. I'm… sorry."_

But he would rather have suffered for a million days and nights rather than have her feel bad for just one minute. However, he couldn't just stay and watch her and she left his life forever. Like he didn't care. He couldn't pretend like that. He'd walked away so she couldn't see the tears he was crying.

Matt punched his pillow. If only he'd stayed a little longer. Maybe she would have told him then that he was the father, and all misconceptions would have been cleared. They could have been happy. He could have married her and they would have been a family together. As it was, they had both spent three years going through unmentionable torture. And now due to another stupid one night mistake he was stuck with Sora. Life was against him. It was the only explanation. Life was simply against him and everything he had ever done.

He heard Sora turn off the shower taps. He turned away from the door. He didn't want to talk to her right now. He couldn't help blaming her, even if just a little, for the way things had turned out. It was easier to blame her for accidentally giving him incorrect information, and for being too willing to get in bed with him that drunken night, than to look deeper within himself and place the blame squarely on his own shoulders.

* * *

Please note that the last lines of this chapter were from Matt's point of view and do not represent the opinions or feelings held by me, the authoress._Emma's useless facts about nothing in particular_

The largest number of children born to one woman is 69 in Russia

_And another because it has been so long and I feel bad_

One human brain generates more electrical impulses in a day than all the world's telephones put together


	5. The Morning After the Night Before

Hey again all who are reading this. It hasn't been that long, has it? I've been updating Lost and Found, which you all should go and read. I'm a shameless self-promoter, so what? Anyways, thanks to those who reviewed, and I now present to you, CHAPTER FIVE.

**The Morning After the Night Before**

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Mimi woke to the harsh sunlight pouring through her window. Trying to block the stream of light that burned her tired eyes, she attempted sitting up. Big mistake. She felt like she'd been hit by a semi-trailer. So much pain. Falling back on her pillow her un-focussed eyes came to rest on an envelope sitting on her bedside table. Recognising the writing to be Tai's untidy scrawl, she fumbled to get the letter.

_Dear Mi,_

_If you're reading this it means you're still alive, something I was unsure of when I left you last night. I think you had a bit much (please note this understatement of the century), so I'll fill you in on what happened. Me and Joe pulled you up the stairs of your apartment building in the early hours of this morning. Joe had an early meeting so he had to leave. I paid Ami and made sure she got safely to her taxi._

Mimi blinked. Ami… that name sounded familiar… but where from?

_In case your hangover has left you in a haze where your brain feels like cotton wool (and I must say I wouldn't be surprised) Ami is the babysitter you employ to mind your son while you are out drinking yourself under the table. _

_As I was saying, you owe me fifty, but I won't take a cent over twenty-five. _

_You may notice you are in bed in your pyjamas. This is also my doing. Don't worry, I didn't see anything I hadn't seen when I went on Izzy's work computer to send an e-mail and found all the porn he'd downloaded. _

Mimi jumped… Tai got her undressed? That was not a good thing. Especially not when she considered the fact she had been so out of it she hadn't even noticed.

_I'm kidding, Mi. Izzy keeps all his porn encrypted… And you actually managed to mostly dress yourself. All I had to do was unzip your dress and unbutton your pyjama top for you. I hung up your dress. You might want to get it dry-cleaned though. I think it got a little muddy when you fell through the bushes outside your building. _

_I checked in on Jamie. He was fast asleep, looked clean and fed. I don't know if it's relevant, but as I was leaving he murmured "Daddy." He may just have been dreaming, and like I said I'm not sure if that matters to you, I'm simply trying to give you an accurate report of events. _

Mimi sighed. Jamie often murmured "Daddy" in his sleep. He was so fixated on getting himself a daddy, so he could be the same as every other kid in his playgroup. He talked about it during the day and dreamed about it at night. It was so sad. She wanted to make him happy, but only one man could fill the shoes of his real father. And that was his real father. And of course, that was never going to happen.

_I'm leaving now Mi. I'm going to lock the door from the outside then shove the key back under the door. Hence you should look near your door for your key. _

_Have a good nights sleep, Mi. _

_Your always loving (and considerate and just plain wonderful) friend_

_Tai. _

Mimi smiled slightly. Not too much because it made her cheek muscles hurt. Tai always looked out for her. Even when nobody else cared enough, he was there for her with a nice broad shoulder to cry on. Like a big brother or something. She'd never had siblings, and even if she had she suspected they would have shunned her like the rest of her family after her unexpected pregnancy. They gave her financial aid occasionally, and sometimes her mother talked to her over the phone, but that socially unacceptable bastard child had really messed around with her family relations. But she liked to think that a big brother would be as good to her as Tai.

Mimi set his letter down and was slowly moving to get up, so as not to further hurt her throbbing head, when a blur of red and blue entered the room. Her son, dressed in his Spider Man pyjamas, landed with a thud on her bed and crawled over to meet his mother. Snuggling into the hollow where her neck met her shoulder, he gave her a big hug. The kind of hug that only a child can give, because only a child is so openly loving. Mimi hugged him back, mentally correcting herself. There were two people who looked out for her and cared for her.

Jamie pulled away. "How was the party mama?"

Mimi was so full of pride for her son. He was the smartest kid she had ever met. She could tell he was going to rival Izzy's intelligence one day. He could speak very fluently for someone his age. And in both Japanese and English.

"Fine darling. We all had lots of fun"

Liar, liar, pants on fire.

Jamie paused, sitting back and examining his mother's face intently as he sucked his left thumb.

"Did you find me a daddy?" he asked eventually, words slightly muffled by his thumb.

Mimi had known this was coming. Every single time she went out she returned to the same question. And the response was always the same.

"No, sweetheart… but remember, you don't need a daddy. You're special just the way you are."

Jamie frowned, pulling his thumb out of his mouth in order to pout effectively. A teary tantrum was on the horizon.

"Don't wanna be special. Wanna daddy!"

Mimi looked away so that her son wouldn't see the tears in her own eyes. Why couldn't Matt have just stayed around? Everything would have been so much easier if he had. Everyone would have been so much happier if he had.

"It… isn't that simple… but I'm trying. I'm really trying, sweetie. I want you to have a daddy too. I do."

Jamie continued to pout for a few more seconds, then broke into a huge grin. He was satisfied. Crisis averted, captain. For now, at least.

"Okay Mummy… Mummy, can we go to the park today?"

Mimi sighed. All that sunlight. All that noise. Her poor aching head. But this was her son. The greatest joy of her mediocre life. The only thing that seemed to stay steady in her moving world. Her stillpoint. Without him she would have nothing. She couldn't say no to him.

"Sure, sweets. Go get dressed and give me some time to get ready, okay?"

He darted out of her room at great speed. Ever since he first put one foot in front of the other, he had not been one to move slowly. Why walk when you can run? The faster the better. Rashly entering situations without much thought as to the consequences. So very, very like his father.

Mimi dragged herself out of bed. Damn hangover. Why did she let the reunion get to her like that? Why did she let Matt get to her like that? She'd had him buried so deeply in that part of her past that she never thought about, why did he have to be resurrected? She was trying to locate her sunglasses to protect her red, tired eyes when the phone rang. The shrill noise pierced through her head like a bullet, but she grabbed the extension and brought it to her ear.

"Hello?" She asked, holding the receiver to her ear with her shoulder and continuing to look for her sunglasses.

"Mimi Tachikawa?" A strangely familiar voice asked from the other end of the line. The voice was low, and just a little uncertain.

"Speaking." Mimi was brisk. If this was yet another telemarketer looking to sell some useless insurance policy or set of steak knives, she was just going to hang up. She didn't have time to listen to their babble.

"Hi… Hi. Mimi, it's me." Mimi didn't reply. She still didn't fully recognise the voice. She knew she knew it, but from where? She didn't think she had heard this voice over the phone for a long time.

"Matt." He added, noticing her pointed silence.

_MATT?_

Why the Hell was he calling her? Why couldn't he let her be? It was torture, seeing him, talking to him, feeling his presence, when she knew that they could never be together. Why couldn't he let her go back to sweet denial? Living in isolation, in quarantine from any emotions she might have. Here she would be flooded and surely drown in all her feelings. He wasn't helping.

"Matt? What… why… I didn't think you had this number."

Dammit Mimi, pull yourself together! Ice queen, remember. Don't let him in. He just stomps all over your heart, wipes his feet on your soul, then marries your best friend. DON'T LET HIM IN!

"Well… Mimi… you see… last night, you left your purse behind." At least he has the decency to see this as awkward. "And I… well I picked it up for you. I have it here."

"Oh." Was all Mimi could say. This whole situation had her somewhat flustered. What could she do? What was he asking her to do?

"Would you like to come around and pick it up? You could bring Jamie. It's about time he met his dad, don't you think? Sora won't be there." Matt was gaining confidence, probably because Mimi had not once yet yelled, sworn at him or cursed him to the deepest ring of Hades. She had also not hung up, which meant he had a chance. Didn't he?

Mimi sank down onto her bed. He was in. He was well and truly in. And pulling on the strings of her heart. She couldn't fight him any more. It was driving her insane. And he was right. Jamie needed to meet his father one of these days. Better now than in ten years when he would be as bitter about it as she was. And she didn't want that feeling for her son.

_Dammit, Matt, how do you have this power over me?_

"Yes… alright… what's your new address again?"

He gave it, and Mimi hung up, shaking a little. She called her son in. He was already dressed, in a bright red t-shirt, black pants, and his pair of sneakers. They were of the kind that were made for little kids, and have the velcro instead of laces. He prided himself on dressing himself, like a big boy.

"Jamie, honey, change of plans. How about we go to the park tomorrow? Mummy has to see an old… friend."

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_Emma's useless facts about nothing in particular_

On average, 100 people choke to death on ballpoint pens every year


	6. Some Things Never Die

Disclaimer: You already know I do not own Digimon, but I also do not own Something Corporate, or their song _The Astronaut_, which is quoted at the bottom of this chapter. Don't sue. You won't get anything worth having. I really, really wish I did though. Seriously, Something Corporate is fantastic and I'd recommend any of their stuff to anyone.

**Some Things Never Die**

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Mimi pulled her little silver car up at the address Matt had given over the phone. She'd taken a cab to the hotel where the reunion had been held, and fetched the car that she'd been too drunk to drive the night before. Now, huge, fancy metal gates faced her. Probably built to keep out the screaming fans. A small smile crossed Mimi's tense face at the thought of teenage girls accosting Matt, ripping him to little rock star shreds. Okay, so she was maybe a little bitter.

She reached out of the window and pressed the buzzer, alerting whoever was in the mansion at the end of the driveway to her presence. Figures. He and Sora get a three-storey mansion with perfectly manicured lawns and gardens, and she gets a two-bedroom house in the American suburbs, and a little apartment here in Japan. Life was never meant to be fair.

A small creak signalled the opening of the gates, and Mimi steered the car in. She wasn't sure if it was the gate to Heaven or Hell that she was passing through, but she expected to find out soon enough. Checking in her rear vision mirror, she could see Jamie in his child seat in the back, curiously looking out the window. She parked, let Jamie out, and then beeped the car locked. Taking a deep breath and grasping Jamie's hand tightly in hers, she approached the front door with the air of someone bravely walking forward to their execution.

The driveway seemed longer with each step she took, as if this torture might never end. But, what seemed like hours after she had left her car, she finally arrived at the front door. Her hand reached up and pressed the doorbell. She didn't remember telling it to. She just watched it with a kind of detached bemusement. She heard chimes playing Greensleeves somewhere deep in the huge house, but it was as if in a daze. She could not believe she was doing this.

Out of nowhere, little padding sounds told her that someone was about to open the door. Oh, God, what was she getting herself into?

Matt opened the door, and Mimi had to bite her bottom lip hard to stop herself sucking in her breath. He was so handsome. So terribly, wonderfully handsome. She'd dressed carefully, in her nicest fluttery pink skirt and white top, and the most tasteful hint of make up, but she still felt inadequate in comparison. He was dressed in long baggy jeans and an expensive green silk shirt with the top three buttons undone. His naked chest matched his bare feet. His hair was freshly washed and gleaming, flicking out around his face. His deep azure blue eyes snapped and sparkled at the sight of her. His mouth was turned up into the merest glimmer of the smile that blazed in his eyes. What she'd give to kiss that mouth, just one more time.

Matt could only stare at the woman in front of him. If only the years that had passed had lessened her charm, maybe then he would have been able to let her go. But, no such luck. The years had made her sadder and more subdued, but had left her with an elegance he'd never seen before in anyone. Before, she had always been a rose. Pretty, flashy, bubbly, and always the centre of attention. Now she was one of those tall white lilies. Pure, exquisite, aloof, and truly beautiful. The way her hair fell, the way her lips smiled her sad smile, the way her eyes always seemed to see something other than what was there. It made his heart ache.

Mimi could have happily stayed there all day, living in this world of memories and joy, only her and Matt. The way things always used to be. But a tickling sensation at the back of her left knee brought her back to reality. Jamie was hiding behind Mimi's legs, scared of this new man. Scared of the power he seemed to have over his mother. Matt appeared to notice, and bent down to the child's level.

"Hey big guy! My name's Matt," he introduced himself. "You must be Jamie."

Still clutching Mimi around the knees, Jamie peered out a little way from behind them and nodded uncertainly. How did this man know his name?

"How old are you?" Matt feigned interest, despite knowing full well how old this child was. "Twenty-seven? Twenty-eight maybe?"

A very little smile crept onto Jamie's face as he shook his head. This man was silly. He held up two of his small fingers. "No, I'm this many!" He readjusted so that three fingers were showing. "Almost this many, Mummy says."

Matt pretended to start in surprise. "But you're so big! And so handsome! I thought you were Mimi's new date!"

The smile grew a little bigger. Matt could see the front few teeth. But he still wasn't satisfied, so he tried even harder.

"Do you want to see a magic trick?"

Nodding furiously, Jamie watched intently as Matt pulled a twenty-cent piece from behind his ear. Success! Jamie's smile spread from ear to ear. Matt winked at Mimi.

"My kid always loves that one too." Turning back to Jamie, he added. "Why don't you come out now?"

Jamie slowly emerged from behind his mother's legs. Matt did a double take, and looked distinctly uneasy. Mimi knew why, of course. James was a miniaturised replica of Matt. He had the same thick spiky blonde hair, the same deep sapphire eyes. He sometimes even got the same cheeky Ishida look that she remembered from Matt's youth. Mimi had often cursed that fact. The memories relived each time she looked into her son's eyes. A living reminder. Quickly recovering from his shock, Matt grinned at the boy. Standing up again, he ruffled Jamie's hair good-naturedly as he spoke.

"Why don't you go inside and find Ben. You two can play with his toys. Do you like… trucks?"

"And trains?" Jamie asked hopefully.

Laughing out loud, Matt replied, "Of course. Go on."

Jamie skittered off inside, leaving Mimi alone with Matt. After a few minutes of awkward silence, Mimi spoke up.

"You're good with kids."

Matt pushed his hair out of his eyes, hoping she couldn't see in his face how hard he had just fought for that child's approval. "Thanks."

Mimi couldn't resist. She tried biting her tongue, but it was creeping out anyways. It had to be said. "Sure would have been great if you'd been there from the start. Jamie needs a dad."

Matt's arms dropped lifelessly to his sides. "Come on, Mi. That isn't fair. I'm trying to make up for it now, aren't I?"

She saw his point, and she almost believed him. But for her son, she kept fighting this. "A part time father isn't right."

Anger welled up inside Matt. She was being unreasonable. "Well it's the best I can do." He replied, annoyed.

Mimi looked at her feet. It was true. It was the best he could do. It would be wrong of her to expect him to leave Sora and start things up with her again. Though, the look he had given her when he had first opened the door had almost made that seem like a possibility. And when she looked deep inside herself, she couldn't deny that was what she really wanted. Her child came first; it should have first priority. But, of course, things never worked like that. It was thoroughly depressing.

"Yeah. Maybe it is." She replied sadly.

Matt's heart shattered at her defeatist tone. If she only asked him to leave Sora, he would do it. He would do anything for her. He didn't care if it left him with nothing, so long as she was happy.

"Anyway, do you want to come inside?" He asked.

"Sure."

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Mimi wandered into Matt's home. However big it looked from the outside, it seemed three times that on the inside. Expensive furniture was artistically arranged across the ankle-thick carpeting, and equally expensive paintings lined the walls. Practically priceless porcelain vases and ornaments stood precariously over just about anything that stood still. Mimi wondered how Sora dared to put them there when she had a two-year-old running around just like she did.

Speaking of whom, Jamie came running up to her, happiness scrawled blatantly across his young face. Next to him was another small boy of about the same build, with a shock of red hair and those typical Ishida eyes. What amused Mimi most was that they were wearing exactly the same shoes.

"Mummy! This is Ben! He likes trains and cartoons and – and – and candy too!" Her son was almost bursting with enthusiasm.

Mimi never thought she'd see the day when her son was playing with this boy. His half brother. The cause of so many problems. But she forced a smile to her face. "That's great! Why don't you guys go play then?"

Coming up behind Mimi, Matt addressed his son. "Yeah. Go on, Big Ben, how about you show Jamie your room?"

Ben nodded furiously. He was evidently one of those eager-to-please children. Must have got that from his mother, as there was little to no evidence of it in Jamie. "Okay Dad!" he said, before signalling in some kind of kid code to Jamie, and running off.

Before leaving to follow Ben, Jamie pulled his mum to his level so that he could whisper in her ear with a certain amount of secrecy.

"I like this man, Mummy." He said. "He could be my Daddy!"

Then he gave Mimi what she could have sworn was a conspiratorial wink, and scurried off after Ben. Mimi could have laughed at the irony. If only he knew, she thought. If only he knew. She could still feel Matt's presence behind her, and she had a sudden desperate and irrational desire for him to wrap his arms around her the way he once did.

But he didn't. All he did was ask, "Would you like something to drink? Tea, coffee, something cool?"

The pain of her longing made her want to cry out. But she had become quite talented at keeping her true emotions concealed. "Tea, thanks, if you don't mind."

She followed him to the kitchen and watched him set the kettle on, pull out two teacups and the teapot, and a jar of loose tea. Everything he did was so deliberate, so calculated. She wondered how he made something as simple and everyday as pouring hot water from the jug into the pot so sensual. Maybe it was just that she wanted him so badly. She wondered if he could possibly feel the same.

He did. His hands were shaking so badly with the wish to touch her, to caress her silky skin, that making the tea was almost impossible. She was so close. So close and yet so unreachably far away. The pain was almost tearing him in two. He finally finished making the tea, and passed her a cup.

"White, one sugar, if I remember correctly." He stated as she took it.

Nodding, she brought it to her lips. It was undeniable; he made good tea. Some special blend, she supposed. Bringing the cup back down to rest on the saucer in her other hand, she noticed Matt watching her intently. Upon being caught out, he quickly took a sip of his tea and asked, in a slightly higher voice than usual,

"Do you want to go out onto the patio? It has a beautiful view of the mountains…"

"I suppose so." She replied simply.

Both of them had forgotten that she had only come around today to get her lost purse. Something else was rekindling, and accessories no longer seemed important to Mimi. She followed him out a sliding glass door and onto a wooden patio that had been built off the side off the house. The ground sloped down steeply away from the house, so the patio almost served as a balcony. She looked out. He was right, the view was breathtaking. She figured that this view would have made this mansion even more expensive. Great land always made a difference. Setting her cup and saucer down carefully on the railing along the front of the patio porch, she turned to Matt, who was now beside her.

"Where's Sora?" she asked, making small talk. She didn't much care where Sora was, so long as she was not there with them.

"Tennis camp. Instructing. Away for three weeks." Mimi could have been imagining it, but she thought that he sounded almost happy at this news.

"Oh… does she do that often? Go away, I mean." Mimi couldn't conceal the small glimmer of hope that perhaps their marriage wasn't working too well. It would be a kind of justice to her.

"Yeah… I guess so." He sounded flippant, uncaring. "At this time of year it's more often. Tennis season. Sometimes she'll be gone for a month or more."

Mimi was sure she hadn't imagined the light tone he'd used in that statement. But really, she thought, why should she dance around it? When he'd walked out on her he had opened himself up for her thorough and complete invasion into his privacy. It was her right. Yeah. Why shouldn't she just ask?

"Matt?"

"Yeah Mimi?" He'd replied quickly. That was a good sign. Made it seem like he wanted to answer her questions. Or was interested in what she had to say. Or both.

In the end, she just had to blurt it out. "Are you happy with Sora?"

Matt bit his lip. He so badly wanted to tell her. But he felt like he was betraying Sora. She'd always been his friend. And now she was his wife. For bad or worse. But this was Mimi. Mimi of the dancing, blissful days of his youth. How could he lie to her? He stalled for time.

"How do you expect me to answer that?"

Mimi turned to him and looked deep into his eyes, sure she'd find salvation there. "Truthfully."

Entranced by her melted honey orbs, he replied, "Truthfully, no. I'm not. And I don't think she is either. We don't love each other. She isn't right for me. She demands affection and attention, and she doesn't know why I can't give it to her. I really did try to, but I just couldn't. We haven't slept together since our wedding night, and we haven't shared a bed in over a year. It isn't working. We both put so much effort into making it seem like it does, but it doesn't. We weren't… meant to be."

Mimi didn't know what to say. She just looked down and began wiping at a lipstick stain on the teacup.

Matt grinned. "Got a bit more than you bargained for, hey Mi?"

Mimi couldn't reply. It was what she had wanted to hear so badly for so long. But now she didn't know where to go from here. She didn't know what to say or how to act. What she desperately wanted to do was kiss him, let out the years of burning passion, tell him to abandon Sora and come and be happy with her. But she couldn't do that. It was socially unacceptable, and moreover, it was intolerable to her sense of pride. She was not going to beg for any man.

She stayed silently playing with her nearly empty teacup until Matt restarted a new thread of conversation.

"So… how long are you in Japan for?" He was trying to make his voice level, as if he was just making an idle comment. Mimi's people skills told her differently. She knew he cared.

"How long is a piece of string?" Mimi replied casually. Let him squirm for a while. Maybe if she kept him frustrated for long enough he would just come out and say he wanted her to stay. Say he wanted her back.

But she was out of luck. "You're a real fountain of information," was all he said, sounding mildly irritated.

Deciding to let him off the hook, she expanded on her answer. "I'm here until I decide to go back. Well, I have to go back in five months to film, so that's the deadline. But I can leave any time between now and then."

"Film?"

"For my cooking show. We spend six months a year shooting the episodes, and the other six months airing them. I'm on my down time now, obviously. All around America people will be watching 'Miss Mimi's Magical Meals' at six o'clock. They'll all think, 'Now isn't that nice. Golly, I wish I could cook like her!' and then they'll flick to the six thirty news or 'Idol' or whatever else takes their fancy. By six forty-five they won't remember what I cooked or what I was talking about or even what colour my dress was. They don't really care." All of Mimi's fears fell together into a garbled mess as she spoke.

Matt put his arm around her shoulders. "I like your show." He said comfortingly.

"It isn't an international show." Her words sounded choked and distorted. "How can you possibly have even seen it?"

Matt rolled his eyes. "Mimi, dear, I am a rock star. I'm supposed to ask for unrealistic, almost unattainable things. Like access to American stations."

Mimi would have laughed if she hadn't been feeling so depressed. "Why would you want to get American stations? There is a Japanese equivalent to just about every American show ever made these days."

"If it was the only way I'd get to see you, I'd fly to Mars." Matt was suddenly serious, his cerulean eyes burning with passion.

"I've been watching stars coming off of the wall, and maybe if I'm lucky I can catch them before you fall. And you are not alone. Calling out to the astronaut. I need some of what you've got." Mimi sang softly. She couldn't help it. His comment about Mars had reminded her of the song. Astronaut, Mars, the connection was perfectly valid. Now to see how he would react…

"I've got you to propel me, I still need so much." Matt added in a whisper.

There was nothing but silence for a few minutes. That had been their song, all those years ago. When they had dated. Before the deluge. It was on one of Matt's CDs, and it had been playing as he asked her out. And it had always seemed to fit their relationship.

"Oh, and Mimi? On the episode that you made your patented caramel mud cake, you were talking about _An Affair to Remember_, Cary Grant as your favourite actor, and how you almost named your son after him. And you were wearing a cute blue sundress that came to your knees. It had little straps, and the left one kept sliding off your shoulder."

Mimi's eyes were shining with tears as she leant against Matt; finally letting her defences drop.

* * *

_Emma's useless facts about nothing in particular_

Butterflies taste with their feet.


	7. Dancing Through Life

As for Just a Reviewer. You make good points. But I can't answer them all, because it's putting the cart before the horse. But as per the Digimon… well, they don't add anything to the story, for one thing. For another, ten years is a long time. Friendships drift, and maybe the people (or Digimon) you relied on as a child aren't as necessary a support base for you as an adult? As for Matt, I won't say too much, but often people are irrational and jump to conclusions when they are hurting.

**Dancing Through Life**

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Two days after she'd gone to meet Matt at his luxury villa, Mimi could still think of little else. He was on her mind as she chopped carrots for dinner, and as she bathed Jamie and he played with his rubber duckie, and as she lay in bed alone, with only the stars to keep her company. He lived in her mind rent-free. And if she was completely honest, she had taken to inventing elaborate fantasy worlds where Matt found Sora in various sexual positions with various members of her tennis club, and commanded her out of the house in a terribly melodramatic fashion. But of course, fantasies were all they were. And it never did anyone any good to dwell on dreams and forget to live.

It was late in the morning, and Jamie was sitting on the pink sofa, humming along with Elmo on the television screen. His little feet bounced up and down, barely reaching over the edge of the seat. He really got on well with Ben, despite Mimi's reservations and cynicism over such a friendship ever happening. Mimi thought it was about time he saw Ben again. After all, friendships need to be nurtured. She should ring Matt and arrange a… play date for them. Her hand moved itself over to the phone, and in a few seconds flat she was hearing the comforting _ring-ring… ring-ring_ in her ear. After five rings, the click at the other end told her that somebody had picked up the phone.

"Hello?"

Mimi almost dropped the phone. It was a female voice. What if Sora was home early? Or worse, if he had some _other_ female caller over. What if she was so unimportant to Matt that he had no qualms about bringing other women over and… having his way with them? Tentatively, her voice wobbling like jelly, she asked,

"Who… who is this?"

"Who is this?" The voice demanded in return, her tone so hard and confident that it scared Mimi half to death. She quailed. Whoever this woman was, she was certainly dominating this conversation. And that wasn't good for Mimi's chances, should she ever have to fight this woman for Matt's affections.

Mimi saw no choice but to answer. "My name is Mimi Tachikawa. I am a… friend of Matt's."

The change in the woman's tone was so swift it was like another person had come on the line. "Oh, _Mimi dear_! Of course. I'm Pachi, Matt's housekeeper. Matt's told me all about you. He says if you call that I should find him immediately, and that no matter what he's doing, if you're on the phone, it can wait. I hope you'll forgive me for being so rude initially. We get a lot of paparazzi calling here. They're so unscrupulous. I have to answer the phone; otherwise they harangue Matt to within an inch of his life! Terrible business. Anyway, I'll go find him. Hold the line please."

Mimi sunk into a chair, her knees weak from relief. Now that Pachi had explained things, it all made sense. Matt was a rock star. He probably got calls all the time from journalists and rabid fans. Imagine if he took them all… he'd never have a moment's peace. So he had to have his housekeeper man the phones. Of _course _he wouldn't answer them himself… she'd been silly to expect him to. Mimi paused in her thought. Being a rock star must be hard. Never allowed to leave your home, people calling day and night… for the first time in over three years she felt real sympathy for Matt.

She heard the phone being picked up, and then the soft bass tones of Matt's voice. "Mimi?" He couldn't hide the lift of hope in his voice.

"Yes… it's me. I was just thinking that… well, you know that Jamie and Ben got along so well on Sunday… I was thinking maybe I might bring Jamie around. So they can play. If that's okay with you… and you aren't busy or anything."

Mimi wondered if that sounded as panicked to Matt as it did to her. She couldn't have known that at the other end of the phone line, Matt was letting his head droop forwards to the desk in front of him. He'd spent two days in a tense, nervous state, wondering when she was going to call, or even if she _was_ going to call. He hoped and prayed she would. He had to see her again. But he hadn't wanted to be the one to call her, in case he faced cold hard rejection. He hadn't known what she'd wanted. Maybe she'd just wanted to forget him. But now that she was calling… all his fears dissolved and he felt as if a huge weight had been lifted from his shoulders. He could barely contain his enthusiasm as he played to her charade.

"Yeah… for sure. That sounds like a great idea. The kids need to… uh… bond. It's good for Ben to have friends his own age. He doesn't meet many. I can't take him to playgroup, exactly. And Sora… is at tennis camp!"

"Yes… so if that's settled… we're in agreement that I should bring Jamie over to play with Ben… when, do you think?"

Mimi couldn't deny that it was awkward, dancing around things like this. It was like trying to pretend that you couldn't see the technicolour elephant that was sitting right in the middle of your living room. But if she was going to be meeting with Matt, excuses were going to be a part of life.

"Well… because I think it's very important that they secure their friendship… how about right now?"

"Okay. Good idea. I'll get Jamie, and be right over. See you soon."

Mimi hung up and took a deep breath. The hard part was over. She slowly released the breath she had been holding and turned her gaze to her son, who was still sitting in front of the television. The end credits were playing for _Elmo's World_. Perfect.

"Sweetheart," she called. "I have an idea. How about we go and see Ben?"

His little blonde head popped up from the top of the couch. His eyes were shining and a big smile lit up his whole face.

"YES! Mummy, his place is lots of fun! His room is a hundred metres long and he has a million toys!" He paused momentarily. "Can I take my train? He said he wanted to see it."

Mimi mentally breathed a sigh of relief. His enthusiasm was the perfect cover. If he hadn't wanted to go… it didn't bear thinking about. She couldn't argue it with him, so she'd be stuck. No Matt. It surprised her how hard that thought was to accept.

"Okay, darling. Go get it and we'll leave in five minutes."

* * *

Mimi was back in the mansion. Jamie was upstairs in Ben's room. Ben had been suitably impressed by Jamie's real working model of a train. As he should be. That train had been a very expensive, imported present. He'd gone to find his own train models, and last Mimi had seen, they'd been making train routes under Ben's bed and through his closet and all around his expansive room. She'd been quite entertained by their simple, happy play, and their theatrical crashing sound effects, and had been content to watch for some time. But then Matt had taken her by the wrist, and suddenly she'd felt like they would be fine on their own for a while.

He'd led her out of the room and into the hallway. He'd slid his hand down into hers. Where his warm, soft skin touched her she felt hot and cold all at once. He turned her to face him. He gazed at her with a quiet, fervent intensity, using his free hand to gently trace her cheekbone. His blue eyes seemed endless as they burned with passion and longing. They locked with hers, and it was electric. They were connected by a bolt of something strong and fiery, and it wasn't about to let them go. This was the way it had always been, all those years ago. Whenever they were together, all else had slipped away. It was like they were magnetically attracted, and nothing could pull them away.

But now, Mimi was scared by it. Sure, she wanted him, but everything was different now. Matt was married to someone… someone other than her, and there were two of his children in a room just down the hall. She broke eye contact, and stared at a patch of carpet.

"So… uh… your housekeeper seems nice." She said, grasping at conversation starters while still staring at the floor.

Matt was frustrated. Just when things were getting back to normal, she had to go and make them all weird and awkward again. But it wouldn't be very gentlemanly to tell her to forget the help and just kiss him, for crying out loud. He couldn't afford to get her offside. Not again. He didn't think he could live through it again.

"Yeah… tough as old boot leather, but a gem. I'd be mobbed by reporters if not for her."

"Where did you meet her?" Mimi's eyes were travelling, touching on everything but his face. She couldn't look at him. She wouldn't risk what would inevitably happen if they locked eyes again. It was bad enough that he still hadn't released her hand. It was like all the nerve endings in her body had been relocated into that one hand, and she could feel every last stroke his thumb made over her palm.

"Sora found her at an agency. Oddly enough, considering she was the one to give her a job, Pachi really doesn't like Sora. Keeps saying she's a bad wife because she's always off at tennis camps. Leaving me locked up alone in my big old house. I try telling her that I _like_ time away from Sora, that it gives me time to write my songs, but she won't hear it."

Despite herself, Mimi found that she was liking the Pachi character more and more by the minute.

"When she answered the phone, I thought she was a lover of yours."

Even as she said it, she was cringing. Stupid thing to say. A little truth can do a lot of damage.

To her great surprise, Matt just chuckled softly. "Mimi dearest, I'm a one woman man." He said lightly.

Well, there went all her chances. Like smoke, they had barely been there to start with. A light layer, hard to see, constantly eluding her. Nothing she could touch or hold or be sure of. Making her afraid to take any kind of plunge. But his declaration had sealed things. If he was a one-woman man, then he belonged to Sora and Sora alone. She'd never find a way in now. In a twisted way, she was glad. Now she didn't have to dive in. Her choice to fiddle around the edges was validated.

But Matt hadn't finished. "For as long as I can remember, my heart has belonged to you. And only you."

That shocked her. Her eyes instinctively flicked to his, to check for the shadows of falsehoods. But whatever Mimi had been expecting, they were crystal clear. She didn't know what to say. He didn't know what to say. The silence enveloped them, but it was not an uncomfortable silence. It was the kind of silence that follows something important, when people are still letting it all settle in and take form in their minds. And suddenly, it all made sense. Everything fell into place, and Mimi didn't know how she could have missed it.

Their lips met in a hungry, frantic kiss. Loose, messy, passionate. Every tension and frustration that had been pent up for over three years was released in one flow of emotion. It was as if dam walls had been lifted, and all that had been hidden and denied for so long was gushing out in this desperate display of affection. Mimi's hands wound themselves in Matt's carefully styled hair, and Matt's were very low on her back, pulling her into him tight and grinding her hips into his.

"We… shouldn't be doing this." Mimi raised a feeble objection, but couldn't stop her mouth raining kisses on his mouth, cheek, forehead, ears. "You're… married."

"Yes…" But Matt couldn't remember why that was a problem. Here, with Mimi in his arms, the reality of his wife and his two children and his everything else seemed to melt to nothing.

Their lips were still locked in a earnest dance, and their hands both began roaming; his under her shirt and hers occasionally slipping tantalisingly into his waistband. Matt groaned, deep in his throat, then broke the contact. He grabbed Mimi by the wrist again and dragged her at a fast jog towards his bedroom. Mimi, light headed and unthinking in ecstasy, ran after him without objection. Matt lay her down on the soft bed with supreme care and affection. Hovering over her, he looked into her eyes and asked the unspeakable question.

Staring into the sapphire depths above her, Mimi no longer saw passion or longing or desperation. All she saw was love. So she smiled, wrapped her arms around him again and pulled him into her.

* * *

Pachi is paochi cute, who's been a very dedicated reviewer and I just wanted to thank her somehow

Also, since I was asked, I don't have AIM, but if you want to head to my information page, you'll find my e-mail, and I'm always happy for you to drop me a line, as it were. I'm also currently doing a bit of betaing, so if you me to look at any of your works for grammar/spelling/turn of phrase, I'd be happy to.

_Emma's useless facts about nothing in particular_

Women blink nearly twice as much as men


	8. Mistakes, I've Made a Few

Hey guys! It's been a while, I know, but I've been updating Lost and Found. Plus I've just started uni and things were a bit hectic. Anyways, because they've settled down a little, I've decided to post the next chapter! Be warned though, there's some hot sex in this chapter. Gratuitous sex scene! It's not hardcore or even very graphic, but I just thought you should know.

**Mistakes, I've Made a Few**

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Lying in Matt's bed, naked body only covered by a thin silk sheet, Mimi thought about all the stupid things she had done in her life. She'd been stupid to say that she liked the idea of visiting America. She'd been stupid to get fiercely drunk and then go and stand on the railing of the Odaiba Bridge, wanting to see if she could fly away from it all. She'd been stupid to say she'd take the lead role in that B movie. Though, in her defence, she didn't know she'd have to play a stripper who wore only a red thong for the whole movie when she'd signed up.

But none of those stupid things came close to rivalling_ this_ stupid thing. What she'd just done. She was sticky with sweat and saliva, amongst other things. She was naked in Matt and Sora's marital bed with a naked Matt lying unashamedly beside her. Her unknowing son was playing with his half brother three rooms down. She could see just one or two things wrong with this picture.

Pulling the sheet with her, she stood. Matt looked up at her, eyes glazed over in post-coital satisfaction. In stark contrast to her frenzied attempt to cover herself as well as possible with the sheet, he seemed completely comfortable in his nudity, spread-eagled on the bed. Didn't he see what they had just done? Could he not grasp the gravity of the situation? How could he be so calm? He had just committed _adultery_. Why wasn't he tying up in knots like she was?

He eyed her lazily, still not covering his nakedness. "What's wrong, babe?"

Mimi was becoming a little hysterical, and had no time for coherency. "What's _wrong?_ You don't _know?_ I just… we just… _Adultery!_ Bad! Don't you see?"

Mimi was on the floor, whimpering as she searched for her abandoned clothing. Matt sat up and was watching her as he replied. "What's so bad about that, Mimi? We love each other, right? This isn't just a bit of a dalliance on the side. At least, I don't want it to be…" he added.

"That's worse!" she cried petulantly. She felt close to tears. How could she do this to Sora? How could she do this to Matt? How could she do this to Jamie and Ben? How could she do this to _herself?_ She thought she had more self respect; more self control than this. How could she allow herself to be raised to such amazing physical and emotional heights at the expense of so many? It had been mind blowing, and her whole body had felt the grip of an ecstasy she'd never known, but it had been so immoral. So utterly reprehensible.

Matt flopped off the bed and began to help her look for her discarded clothes. "And why exactly is that worse?" He asked.

"Because! Because it is!" She struggled to articulate herself. "People's feelings are involved! It's deeper! It hurts more!"

Handing Mimi her bra, he gazed at her levelly. "Yes. You're right. People's feelings _are_ involved. My feelings for you, and the feelings I'm going to assume you have for me. I want to be with you. Why can't that count for anything?"

Standing there in only her underwear, Mimi folded her arms. "Because you're married," she said snidely, feeling just a little bit vindictive. "You chose Sora, and this is where it got you. Sometimes we have to live with the consequences of our actions. You can't be with me while you're tied to her. It's not right."

Matt looked at her for a moment, and then crossed the gap between them. Taking her hands in his own, his face was but a few centimetres from hers. Gazing deep into her eyes for a moment, he murmured in his deep husky voice, "So… this would be wrong then?"

His lips caught hers. Their movements were perfectly choreographed to know just the right pressure, just the right speed and just the right sensuality. Matt Ishida was the only person in the world who could kiss like this. No matter how much her mind cried out that this was very wrong and very bad, her body betrayed her. To her own dismay she felt herself slide into his kiss. Her tongue met his. Her knees went to mush and her body fell softly into his. Within minutes his hands left hers and snaked under the strap of her thong. Her own hands wound tightly in his hair as she gave a low moan. Her body began moving of its own accord, until even her stubborn, set mind was abandoning any pretence of not wanting this.

Then, without warning, he pulled back. Grinning, he said smoothly, "I think you answered my question quite satisfactorily."

Mimi was breathing hard. She should have known better than to start a dirty fight with an Ishida. "That wasn't fair!" she panted. "That was not an unbiased test!"

He smiled benignly. "All's fair in love and war, Mi. Or haven't you heard that one?"

He was answered with only a glare as Mimi went back to dressing. With a small, satisfied smirk, he too began pulling on his clothes. When they were both fully clad, though significantly more tousled than before, they walked together back to Ben's room. Matt's fingers intertwined with Mimi's, and she didn't pull away. Looking through the door, both boys were still happily playing with their trains. Each of them looked up, and said in exact unison,

"Hi Mummy!"

"Hi Daddy!"

In a weird way, it was like they were all one big happy family. A very dysfunctional family, but a family nonetheless. A mother, a father, and two brothers who actually liked each other. If only that scene weren't merely one for the movie screen.

Matt leant into her and whispered in her ear, "So… when can I see you next?"

Mimi thought. On one hand, there was the adultery. The pain, the suffering, the moral unacceptability. The fact it could only end in tears. But on the other hand… it was all she'd ever wanted. The little family back together. The way things should have been. Happiness, love, and Matt. And in a situation like this, the ethical lines were a shade more blurred than usual.

She murmured back, "Friday. I'll be here at 11. But we have to keep this a secret."

Smiling, Matt wrapped his arm around Mimi's waist. This might just work out after all, he thought, as he surveyed the family he had created. This might turn into something real.

* * *

And review! More _hawt sexx_ or less, do you think? There will be more sex scenes in the future, I think, just because what Mimi and Matt have, at this point, is a sexually based affair. But it's all up to you how hot it goes. No NC-17, though, okay? I don't want to get kicked off the site.

_Emma's useless facts about nothing in particular_

If Barbie were real, her measurements would be 39 - 23 - 33 and she would stand seven feet, two inches tall.


	9. Conspiracy Theories

Hey guys. It's been a while, hasn't it? Sorry about that. Anyways, before you read on, I would like to clear some things up. This chapter may seem like a filler, and a tad drawn out, but I assure you, _it is important_. You may not grasp why just yet, but soon it shall all fall into place.

**Conspiracy Theories**

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Mimi had given Matt a break until Friday. A couple of days. What she thought was suitable downtime. Enough time to keep him in suspense, not enough time for him to go cold on her. Dating was always all about the timing. But now she had what seemed like an infinite stretch to fill before they next met. In all truth, she was getting a little impatient.

Sitting next to Jamie on the sofa, she figured she should try to get out of the house. Otherwise she knew she'd go absolutely stir-crazy. Gaze falling on the phone, she thought that maybe there was another digi-destined that she should catch up with while she was in town. Picking up the cordless, she dialled Tai's number. They could go out for coffee and lunch. Talk about things. Not the_ Thing._ That was a big secret. But other things. The way they used to.

After a few rings, Mimi heard the click of an automated response. Assuming he was just at work, or perhaps in the shower, she waited to leave a message.

"Hello my dear, _adoring_ fans. This is Tai. Obviously. I'm not at home right now. For the next three weeks I am off at a father and son retreat with Tai Junior. So while you're all slaving away at your meaningless, consumer driven lives, picture me kicking the winning goal in a soccer game, crushing my opponent in a round of tennis, or sipping a non-alcoholic beverage by the sea after lifesaving lessons. Leave me a message from the mundane world, and I'll call you when I'm back."

Mimi left him a brief message for him to call her, and then hung up. Lucky Tai, going away on a sporting camp. It sounded like fun. Getting out of the city and spending quality time with Tai Junior, who was ironically nicknamed TJ.

TJ was not Tai's real son. Tai Junior was certainly not his real name. Tai was a member of a charity organisation that partnered orphaned children with a surrogate parent. It was similar to the Big Brother, Big Sister program. The surrogate mother or father took the child out and showed them the kind of good time that a parent ought to show their kid. Tai claimed he did it because he'd developed a certain addiction to saving people while in the Digiworld. Mimi often suspected he did it because he was lonely. All the digi-destineds had paired themselves up, and those that hadn't were self-confessed workaholics. Plus, his best friends had always been Matt and Sora, and that opened up a whole other set of complications. As she knew all too well.

Mimi tapped her chin with the phone, contemplating calling somebody else. Izzy? Probably at work. Joe? Same again, or with Amelia. TK or Kari? University. Yolei… Yolei was possible. Mimi dialled her home number. After many rings, the phone was picked up and a breathless voice said,

"Hello?"

"Hey Yolei, it's me. Mimi." Mimi replied, leaning back against the wall as she spoke. "I haven't caught you at a bad time have I?"

"Oh, Mimi, hi." Yolei sounded a little distracted. "No, not at all. Just the kids wearing me out, as usual."

Mimi laughed. "Great. I know what you mean. And I've only got one. Look… I was just wondering if you'd like to go out. The kids can play together and we can indulge in some caffeine."

Yolei's response showed absolutely no thought whatsoever. "For coffee, anything. I'd love to get out of the house. Shall we say Odaiba Central in forty-five minutes?"

"Sounds like a plan," Mimi said. "See you there."

They each said goodbye and hung up. Mimi grinned. Excellent. A distraction. Something to take her mind off the deep, primitive cravings she was having for Matt. All she had to do was see a blonde man and she felt a fizzle down low in her abdomen. It wasn't right. Or normal. She needed to stop herself getting attached. Matt wouldn't divorce Sora. It'd be too much of a scandal for his publicists to have to deal with. Divorcing your loyal wife for a mistress who bore your child out of wedlock. It didn't sound like such a fabulous piece of publicity. Besides which, Mimi wasn't sure she wanted Matt to leave Sora. Of course on some level she did, but at the expense of breaking up a family? She'd bear such guilt.

She shook herself from her thoughts and went to find her son. They'd have to leave soon to be at Odaiba Central Park in forty-five minutes.

* * *

"So… do you have a man in your life now Mi?"

Yolei and Mimi were comfortably settled on a park bench. Each had a large coffee in hand. Erin was lying in her pram, gurgling happily as she played with a teddy bear. Not too far away, Jamie and Reece were running after Michaela, who, as the eldest, was clearly far superior to either of them. Jamie, who'd never met a real five-year-oldbefore, was gazing at her with adoration and reverence.

Mimi spoke without thinking. "I'm seeing him on Friday."

Seconds later she realised what she'd done. She'd broken her own golden rule. Her mind had been so fixed on Matt; his rough voice, his eyes, his smile, his sculpted body; that it had just been there, ready to say.

Yolei slapped her hand against Mimi's thigh good-naturedly. "Mimi, that's fantastic! It's so good to see you dating again. It makes me sad to see you on your own, when once married happiness was so easily in your grasp. So who's the guy, then? Do I know him? Is it Tai?"

Halfway through rolling her eyes at Yolei's happy marriage comment, Mimi's jaw fell. She was disbelieving. "Tai?" she asked incredulously.

"Well, he did take you home from the reunion." Yolei justified, rocking Erin's pram a little. "And he's always looked out for you."

Mimi shook her head. "It isn't Tai. I don't think he ever got over Sora. We're just good friends that understand each other. Besides, he's away at a sporting retreat with TJ for three weeks."

Yolei sipped her latte pensively before answering. "How odd, that so many of us digi-destineds are off on holiday."

"Who else?" asked Mimi, trying to steer Yolei away from the topic of her love life. Besides, she felt so out of touch. Like she was alone in some foreign country where nobody spoke her language.

"Well," Yolei began, crossing her legs and straightening her skirt as she started ticking people off on her fingers. "Joe's taken Amelia on a romantic couple's cruise where he may just be proposing to her, if he can summon the guts. Poor thing… courage was never his strong point. Sora's in the middle of nowhere teaching tennis at some camp. TK and Kari are bed and breakfasting, much to Davis's disgust. He thinks he knows what they get up to on their little weekends away. Such a dirty mind. He's wrong, of course, but it's fun to watch him stew. And here you are telling me Tai's at some retreat doing manly, sporting things with TJ."

Mimi smiled. "You're becoming quite the gossip queen, Yolei Ichijougi."

"Well, Mimi Tachikawa, _somebody_ had to pick up the slack when you left." Yolei quipped.

They both laughed, and Erin gurgled a little before silence descended again. Yolei looked like she had something on the tip of her tongue, but wasn't sure if it could be said. Mimi sighed.

"Out with it." She commanded.

Yolei still seemed hesitant, as if worried she might hurt Mimi's feelings, but her curiosity eventually won out. "Well… it's just that there are some things I don't understand. About your past, I mean. Not that it's any of my business. Tell me to shut up if you want. But it's all been kept so quiet and well… it's like… walking into a movie halfway through."

Mimi sighed. She should have expected this. "Tell me what you already know, and I'll try to fill in the blanks."

Yolei fiddled with her skirt as she spoke, eyes fixedly staring at her shoes. "Well… you were dating Matt, and you were at his twenty-first, and you two were together just about the whole night. Ken and I were saying you guys would be the next big digi-destined wedding. But then you went back to America and… I don't know, but when you came back about a month and a half later I'd never seen you so distracted. Like, when I took you out for brunch and you spent five whole minutes buttering your plate instead of your croissant. Of course, I found out later that you were pregnant. And I know you told Sora practically as soon as you landed, but nobody else for ages. You didn't want to spend any time with Matt at all. And then you told him you were pregnant and… something happened. Then I saw you and you swore you'd never speak to him again. I'd never seen you in such a fury. I don't understand why. Did Matt say something to hurt you? I assume you'd gone to see him so you could break up with him, so did things get ugly? That's what we all figured must have happened, but we've never been sure. That Matt had been a real man-bitch when faced with losing you. Which was really very selfish of him. But… what happened to Michael? I mean, Jamie is his son, isn't he? And you dumped Matt so that you could be with Michael and have a family, right? So why aren't you guys together now? If you cared for him enough to have his child and break up with the guy you'd loved for nearly ten years, what could have possibly happened? I just… I just don't get it."

Mimi's jaw was somewhere in the vicinity of the ground. She could hardly gather herself together enough to speak. When she did, it was disjointed and spluttered.

"Where… what… how did you get _that_ information?"

Yolei looked surprised, as if that wasn't the reply she'd expected at all. She sounded uncertain as she answered.

"Well… I got it from a variety of places, in bits and pieces. I suppose Sora told me a lot. She'd spent a lot of time with Matt after… after you two had your showdown, so I thought… well I thought she would know. She told me things that Matt had said and done, anyway..."

Mimi's heart was racing. What was going on? Why did Michael keep coming up? He was _completely unrelated_. He was her friend, her supporter, but that was all. Who had started this crazy idea that he was Jamie's father? Was it Matt, trying to escape blame? But he'd seemed so sincere when he'd spoken to her at the reunion. Bitter and resentful, even. Mimi didn't think he could fake that. So was there some conspiracy going on? Did Michael know about this? Worse, was he _behind_ it? But no. That didn't sound like him. As far as she knew, he hadn't had any contact with the Japanese digi-destineds in five years or more. She didn't think he could be involved. So why was Sora throwing his name into this mess? Mimi was beginning to doubt the information she's given Sora, that day she'd come back to Japan. Thinking hard, she tried to remember their exact conversation.

"_Sora, I have something I need to tell you. It's important."_

"_Sure, Mimi, shoot."_

"_I'm… pregnant."_

"_That's such good news! … Isn't it?_

"_Yes. And no."_

"_Who's the father?"_

"_Matt, of course! I haven't slept with anyone else, ever. But don't say anything, please. I have no idea how to tell him…"_

So Sora must have known that Michael wasn't implicated. So why was she spreading that he was? Had Matt told her that, she'd believed him? What _had_ Matt told Sora? Things were getting so complicated. There were so many secrets and rumours running around. Before she'd just thought Matt was ill-informed through some weird misunderstanding. But now… she wasn't sure it had been an accident. There was something very, very amiss.

She turned to face Yolei, determination setting her features.

"Yolei, despite anything you may have heard to the contrary, Michael is not Jamie's father. He's my friend, and that is all he has ever been. The only man I have ever been with is Matt. Jamie was definitely conceived that night of Matt's twenty-first. I came back from America to tell Matt he was going to be a father, but I never specified that the child was his. Looking back on it now, I suppose he must have thought something similar to you. And he left me. That was why I was so furious with him. I don't know why Michael came into this, but we are absolutely not romantically involved, and we never were."

Yolei looked dumbstruck. With wide-eyed wonder, she said, "Mimi, I… I had no idea. What a thing to have happened to you! All this time none of us knew. We weren't nearly angry and disappointed enough in Matt. Leaving you with a baby to take care of, all by yourself…"

Mimi was brisk, waving this away. She didn't want that wound reopened. "Yes, well. I'm over all of that now. It's in the past. What I'm more concerned about was how Michael fell into this. How this rumour started. It makes no sense. These things don't just come out of nowhere, but I don't understand how it could have arisen at all."

Yolei had a worried look slashed across her face, her eyebrows almost joined in a frown of concern. "I don't know, Mi. The only thing I can say is that I suppose the rumours weren't helped by the fact that you disappeared back to New York without a word to just about anyone. Nobody really knew the story."

_Except Sora. _"Yes…" Mimi didn't know what to think, so she remained quiet.

"Well, these are the sorts of things that happen when you sleep with a guy out of wedlock, Mimi dear. I hope you've learnt your lesson." Yolei spoke jokingly, and had the distinct air of someone trying to bring the conversation back to a level that was steady and certain. The atmosphere had gotten far too dark.

Mimi forced a smile. "Oh, and you and Ken were celibate until your honeymoon, then? Yeah, right. Sure. I believe that."

Yolei laughed. "Don't you remember? I never wanted to kiss him; I just wanted to marry him!"

The conversation returned to light banter, but underneath her giggles, Mimi's mind was racing. She needed to talk to Matt.

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_Emma's useless facts about nothing in particular_

In sailing, a dog watch lasts two hours.


	10. Interruptions to the Past

I'm back! And just to warn you, this chapter contains sexual situations which you may feel uncomfortable reading. If that is so, just scroll past the middle section and down to the end. Thank you.

**Interruptions to the Past

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**

Mimi was standing in front of her full-length mirror. It was still quite early on Friday morning; the sun low in the eastern sky, but Mimi was already dressed to kill. She'd had her outfit planned for days. Her quest for the right dress had been bordering on an obsession. She didn't know why she cared so much; all she knew was that she had to look good. She wanted Matt to need her. She wanted to knock him dead. She wanted him to be in her power. She wanted him to be out of control and unsure, the way she had been for so many years.

She had chosen a short, strapless black dress that showed off her sculpted curves and lithe legs. She knew from past experience that Matt did not have a problem with her displaying such features. That, in conjunction with her perfectly styled hair and classically made-up face, made her sure that there was no way that Matt could resist her.

Striding into Jamie's room, kitten heels clicking a swift beat, she gently shook her son awake. Bleary eyed, he rubbed his face with his small hands and asked,

"What, Mummy?"

Mimi smiled and ran her had through his fluffy blonde hair.

"We're going over to Ben's! You had better get ready!"

As much as she hated having the children in the house while she and Matt… did what they did… Jamie was her excuse for being there at all. What if the paparazzi caught her over at Matt's place all by herself? Or worse, Sora? There was no option.

* * *

Mimi arrived at Matt's late in the morning. The door was answered literally within seconds of her ringing the doorbell, and Mimi had the sneaking suspicion that he had been watching out of the window, waiting for them. He ushered the two of them inside, his hand resting lightly just above Mimi's rear as he guided them. Both he and Mimi stayed silent as Ben skittered in. After a rapid-fire conversation, both of them ran off towards the sitting room. As Mimi found out later, Jamie had discovered that Ben had the whole _Thomas the Tank Engine_ series on tape. Going into transports of delight, he had begged to see it and Ben, ever eager to please, had acquiesced easily. Effectively leaving the two adults alone together. 

"Nice dress, Mi." Matt said in his deep, rumbling tones. Scrunching the hair at the back of his neck, he added, "But I'm sure it wouldn't look as good if it weren't… on you."

He'd deliberately left his emphasis ambiguous, and Mimi smiled at his attempt to be smooth. "Why, thank you Matt. Do you think we should test that theory? In the name of science and all?"

Matt's eyes sparked like the rays of the sun bouncing off the sea. She was playing his game. She was letting go of her fears and anxieties and succumbing to the desires he knew they shared. He loved her so much it made his heart sing, and it hurt him deeply to see her fighting and refusing to love him back. He knew that it was what he deserved, and that after what he'd done, he was not worthy of ever seeing her again. But it didn't stop him wanting her to be his.

"Yes. Yes I do. So you should come up to my room so that we may conduct this experiment."

Mimi nodded, and they both made their way towards the stairs. Their hands brushed as they ascended, each of them stealing sideways glances and trying not to smirk. They made it to Matt's bedroom so quickly Mimi felt like she must have been flying, and Matt slammed the door behind them. Facing Mimi, his eyes were dark, pupils dilated so that the cerulean blue was almost completely black. Within seconds he'd pinned her to the wall, making her stomach fizzle with expectant desire. Matching lust zapped in his eyes, and his lips crushed on hers with a fervour and passion Mimi had never seen in anyone else. He was kissing her like he had been aching to do so for days, his tongue massaging hers with expert skill and fiery determination.

Sucking on her lower lip, he tugged on her dress. It pooled at her feet and she kicked it out of the way. Matt pulled away and gazed down on the garment.

"I was right. Not as nice off you."

Mimi laughed and wrapped her arms around him, effectively returning his focus. His kisses became messier, lighter as they rained on her face, hair, neck and shoulders. Mimi tangled her hands in his thick blonde mane, moaning as his long fingers explored every hidden inch and intimate place on her body. It was sometime around then that they both shed what remained of their clothes, leaving them only in their underwear. Matt's lust was taking over, and he pressed his body further into hers. Feeling him rubbing against her, what little patience Mimi had completely dissolved. Her whole self was crying for release. Grabbing him by the boxers, she pulled him over to the bed.

* * *

Post-coital, Mimi snuggled down into the soft blankets of Matt's bed. Matt, sated, lay next to her, flat on his back with his arms folded behind his head. Squirming like a caterpillar, she moved to rest her cheek on his chest. There was an easy silence, as Mimi just listened to Matt's deep, slow breathing and the still slightly raised beating of his heart. She was lightly tracing the ridges of his toned abdominals when she spoke. She didn't even realise she had said anything until it was already hanging in the air above them. It was as if the thoughts she tried to keep buried in her most deeply secret heart of hearts had bubbled up and out without the approval of her mind. 

"Matt… when you thought Jamie was Michael's son… and you thought I'd cheated on you… did you hate me?"

Matt shifted a little under her, his hand lowering to gently stroke her hair. "Never," he murmured. "Not for a second. I_ tried_ to hate you, because hating you would have been so much easier than what I was going through. I hated Michael, I'll admit that. I had moments of temporary insanity during which I thought the best course of action would be to fly over to the States and commit bloody murder. But there was always something about you that just wouldn't let me stop loving you. Your laugh, maybe, or the way you flicked your hair… or it could have just been my memories. Whatever it was, not a moment went by that I didn't think of you, hoping Michael was treating you right."

He took a deep breath before continuing. "But I can't lie to you. I… I hurt pretty badly. And I hit the booze in a big way. Drowning my sorrows, I guess you could call it. Blissful oblivion, up to a point… but I think that might be a story for another day."

Mimi touched her lips to his bare chest. "I'm so sorry," she whispered. "I wish we could turn back time. I wish fate had been kinder to us. I wish Sora had never passed on the wrong information…"

Matt cut in. "I wish I'd just stayed five seconds longer to ask who the father was. I wish I hadn't believed her. Every day I wish."

Mimi propped herself up on her elbow and looked at him evenly. "Why _didn't_ you ask who the father was?"

Matt sighed, finding a spot on the far wall to gaze at so that he didn't have to meet her questioning stare. "I don't know. A lot of reasons, in hindsight. I heard the news from Sora, and I assumed that as your best friend she would know. Then there was my pride; I didn't want to seem like there was anything in your life that I didn't already know about. But I suppose the biggest reason was that I didn't think I could stand to hear that you were leaving me. I thought that if I walked away and didn't hear it, somehow it would hurt less. It sounds so stupid now…"

Mimi smiled and cuddled up to him again. "I can understand wanting to hurt less. But I still don't know what Sora told you to make you believe I was having Michael on the side."

Matt knew he should have expected this question. Much as he didn't want to have to answer, Mimi had a right to know what an idiot he had been. He took a deep breath and tried his best to tell things exactly the way they had happened.

"A little while after you flew in, maybe a week, I saw her in the shopping mall. She told me you were pregnant, and that was why you were avoiding me. I assumed the child was mine, and after initial shock I was quite happy. Then she said it was Michael's, and I was crushed. I didn't want to believe her, but she'd sown the seeds of doubt. I started thinking of how much time you spent in New York, and how easy it would have been for you to have… dalliances. And Sora only made things worse, calling me all the time and asking whether I'd talked to you and sorted the Michael issue out. She said she'd thought you'd been cheating on me for at least a year. I don't know… then when you confirmed what she'd said about the pregnancy, I just assumed the rest was true as well. I'd been so obsessed with the concept of you and him together, I couldn't think of any other possibilities. I was so foolish. So terribly, utterly irrational. I've always been that way… jumping to conclusions… I just hope you can forgive me for it, one day."

Mimi knew she would forgive him. It would be impossible for her not to. Love made people do things they never normally would. But one person Mimi didn't think she could ever forgive was Sora. She had told her about the pregnancy the day after she had arrived. There was no way Sora could have misunderstood, and if Matt was right about the timeframe, then Mimi was certain that the attack must have been calculated and deliberate.

Now Mimi just had to decide what to do with her knowledge.

* * *

_Emma's useless facts about nothing in particular_

An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.


	11. Back on Track

It's been a long time, no? Sorry. Life got hectic and writing had to take a backseat to everyday drama. Anyway, I hope this chapter is worth the wait. There's a little bit of low-key sex at the very beginning, so if you don't like it you should just skip down a few paragraphs.

**Back on Track**

* * *

Weeks passed. Mimi spent as many days, hours and minutes as she could with Matt. His presence was intoxicating, and she couldn't get enough. She craved his touch, lived on his kiss. He moved her to a higher plane. She wanted to hate him for her dependency. She wanted to scratch and bite him; to make him bleed and lose as much of himself for her as she had lost for him. But she couldn't stop her heart melting when he smiled. She was like a child, demanding affection after being starved for so long. Always wanting that golden star.

She tried not to think about Sora. She still didn't know what she wanted from her. An apology? Not enough. Blinding pain? Possibly too much. Divorce? She didn't want to go down that road yet. That could come later. Maybe.

She and Matt were sharing a bed again. Something they did regularly. Pachi, either being a supremely understanding and kind woman or looking for a Christmas bonus the size of Mount Fugi, had taken both Ben and Jamie to the park. This left Mimi and Matt to do as they wished alone, which included being naked, entwined and moving as one. Both moaning loudly, they each knew the other was close. Then out of nowhere, Matt heard the gate screech open. Both he and Mimi went rigid. Unmoving, they continued to listen. A car was definitely pulling into the driveway.

"Maybe… maybe Pachi's back early…?" Mimi theorised hopefully.

Matt shook his head from his position above her. "She would have used the back entrance. And that gate is the height in home security. Either I let you in, or you have the sensor. The only people with a sensor are me and Sora."

Sora was home.

Mimi thanked her lucky stars that she had parked her car out on the road today. Sora need be none the wiser. Still, this was a terribly close call. They could easily be found out. Mimi looked up at Matt, who was reluctantly withdrawing from her.

"I thought you said she wouldn't be home for…"

She didn't finish. It didn't matter, really. Sora was there; right outside in her top of the line Lexus, and assigning blame wasn't going to change that. Matt had slid out of bed, and Mimi moved to follow suit.

"I guess it's time," Matt said with a sigh. "I was hoping it would come later rather than sooner, but I suppose it has to happen."

"Yeah..." Mimi whispered. Still sitting on the edge of the bed, she felt like she might cry. Taking a deep breath, she told herself to be strong. Everything wonderful had to come to an end eventually. Especially if that everything was married with a family.

Matt was standing, pulling his boxers on. He was unsatisfied and it showed. "Come on then. Let's go. It's not going to be easy, but we have to do it."

"I know." Mimi's voice seemed to be stuck on whisper. Her throat was incurably dry. She busied herself collecting her clothes so that he wouldn't see the tears welling in her eyes. Whoever said it was better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all had obviously never loved and lost. To be so happy; for the world to be so perfectly aligned; and then to have it all stolen away. Like a rug being pulled from underneath your feet, a trip and a stumble and an unwanted return to reality.

Matt, now only missing a shirt, stopped to gaze over at her. "So we'll do find Sora, explain it all, and tell her I'm leaving. Right?"

Mimi was shocked as she spun to face him. "What? No! We can't!"

Matt was confused. His shirt hung limply in his hands. "But… why? I don't understand. I was always intending on it, Mi. I stayed with Sora only because I couldn't have you. She was the consolation prize. Now that you're back… well, I thought we could be together."

Mimi didn't have time to think about the various offensive statements Matt had just made. "We just can't!" she cried. "I can't lower myself to that level. To… her level."

Matt crossed to her in two steps. He took both her hands in his, cutting her off halfway through zipping up her skirt. She looked up to meet his earnest stare. The blue of his eyes seemed honestly panicked.

"What does this mean?" he asked. "Are we over? Is that what you're saying? Please Mimi, don't do this. I don't think I could stand losing you again!"

Mimi pulled away from him and returned to buttoning up her shirt. "I don't know what this means. We're not over. There's no time to discuss this now."

As if confirming her statement, they both heard the front door swing open. Sora's voice broke through the thick tension.

"Benny? Matt? Where are you both? A woman gets home from weeks away from her family and they don't even come to greet her? How insulting."

With what seemed like a lot of difficulty, Matt nodded. He swung his shirt around his shoulders as he spoke. "I'll… I'll stall her. You go out the back door and get Ben and Jamie. We'll pretend like you had them. You're the actress. Bring them back and make something up. I'll follow your lead."

Doing a quick check of the room to make sure their tryst wasn't too obvious; Mimi and Matt skidded down the stairs. If they were fast, Matt could head Sora off in the living room, and Mimi could creep like a mouse down the hall to the kitchen and out the rear exit. It was just a few more feet, just a few more seconds…

Mimi saw a shadow under one of the doors. Oh, if Sora opened that door then they would be so sprung. Caught red handed. Their goose would be cooked. It would be over. Matt must have seen it too, because he leaped the short distance, almost knocking over a vase in the process. While he held the door shut, Mimi scurried to hide in the hallway. Split seconds later, Matt wrenched the door open and threw his arms out in greeting, blocking Sora's path. Mimi had to take her chances while they were there. She stole away to the tune of _"Sora! You're home early! What a surprise!"_

She ran out the back door and down the side path. She had to get the kids and she had to get them fast. Sora was bound to miss her son soon, and she couldn't give Matt the time to weave too complex a web of lies. Their stories had to match. To the letter. Maybe she was paranoid, but she wasn't about to let one stupid little lie ruin every happiness she had.

She darted into the nearby park, where she knew Pachi had taken Ben and Jamie. She knew she must look a fright, as she hitched her skirt above her knees so that she could move faster. Her hair was blowing all over the place and her face was blotchy with exertion. Her hastily thrown on clothes were in disarray. But that didn't matter. Nothing mattered except getting the two boys back to the mansion. She called out, and Pachi, who was sitting on a bench watching Ben and Jamie make train tracks in the sandpit, looked up.

"The lady is back." She stated, showing amazing perception. Mimi, doubled over to catch her breath, could only nod as she gulped air. Pachi stood, straightened her dress, and continued. "We have to get back, then. Quickly now."

She scooped Ben into her arms and Mimi did the same for Jamie. Minutes later, she was back outside the Ishida front door. She was sure she must have set some world record for her sprint. Pachi had left Ben with her, and shot around to the back door. Mimi took a short moment to gather her wits about her, tried to flatten her hair and smooth out her frazzled appearance, then walked through the front door and into the living room. Where she'd left them.

Of course, she hadn't left them with their lips locked.

The world ground to a halt. Her heart seemed to shatter and reform in a particularly painful process. She was oddly aware of scents, tastes and sounds. She seemed to be burning up in her skin, and yet she had broken out in to goose bumps all down her arms. There was no good reason. She was the other woman. She was the one on the outer. And yet needles of jealousy still stabbed through her veins.

She made a funny strangled noise in the back of her throat, and Matt and Sora jumped apart like two sprung teenagers. The moment was intensely awkward, as Mimi stared at Sora and Sora stared at Mimi and Matt glanced nervously at them both. At some stage Ben broke away from Mimi and ran into his mother's arms. He squealed something, but Mimi couldn't make it out. But it was around this time that Mimi remembered how to speak.

"Hi, Sora. It's nice to see you again."

_Keep things simple; bland and vague. Don't say anything specific until you know what she knows. _

"Mimi. Hi. It's been a long time, no? What are you doing here?" Her tone wasn't cold or bitter, but it was guarded. If Mimi were Sora, she would be on the defensive too.

Mimi knew better than to look at Matt before answering. Dead giveaway; having to get confirmation on a fact. Makes you look like you have something to hide. She'd just have to hope that Matt would jump in if he'd already covered a field of conversation.

"I took Ben and Jamie to the park. Figured you would both want your son back."

Sora looked mildly confused. "How do Ben and Jamie know each other?"

_Subtext: Why have you been coming around to my home?_

Mimi decided to just tell the truth on that count. With so many lies to remember with this affair, telling the truth even a little made things so much simpler. Plus, in a hotbed of falsity, the tiniest speck of truth was like a beacon of light.

"I left my purse at the reunion a few weeks ago. Matt picked it up for me. I came by with Jamie to reclaim it. Jamie met Ben and they hit it off. Common love of trains, I think. As I understand it, Ben doesn't get to meet many kids his own age."

_Insert lightly veiled jibe at her parenting skills for bonus points_.

Sora's smile became rather fixed. Which was only natural. If anyone questioned Mimi's ability as a mother, she would probably lunge for the jugular. "Yes. Well. How many times have they been meeting?"

_Subtext: How often have you been at my home, alone with my husband?_

Matt cut in, trying to diffuse the hostility in the air. "A few times, darling. Ben really likes getting out of the house, and we both know that I can't take him. I get stuck here, only playing on my lonesome guitar."

Sora still didn't seem placated, but Mimi didn't give her a chance to reply. "Well, I have to run off now. Things to do, people to see. I'll arrange the next play date soon."

And with Jamie's hand in hers, and Matt's eyes fixed on the back of her head, she walked out of the building. So Sora was back. Things were changing. That was fine; Mimi could adapt. This was going to be interesting.

Game on.

* * *

_Emma's useless facts about nothing in particular_

In ten minutes, a hurricane releases more energy than all of the world's nuclear weapons combined.


	12. Spin that Bottle

Okay. I know I've taken forever to update. I'm sorry. I'm the worst procrastinator ever. I don't deserve lovely readers like you. Please forgive me. I'll even bribe you with this new chapter!

**Spin that Bottle**

* * *

Seeing Matt became exponentially more difficult with Sora on the scene. Their tryst was even more complicated than it should have been, as Matt's stardom confined him almost exclusively to their home. They couldn't go out without attracting the paparazzi's attention. But Mimi wasn't going to shy away from the challenge. She'd always been stubborn when it came to getting what she wanted. So she and Matt persisted in seeing each other. When Sora was conducting her tennis school, or went shopping, or to lunch with one of her clients, Mimi took her chances while she had them.

Matt would call. Two rings only - that was their signal. Then they usually had about an hour and a half of time together. There had been close calls, of course. Once, Sora's lunch date had been cancelled and she'd run in, clearly upset, only seconds after Mimi had run out of the room. Sora had bemoaned the way people always let you down when you need them most, while Mimi hid naked in the next room, heart hammering.

But Mimi didn't actually have to deal with Sora in person until weeks after her return. It was TK and Kari's engagement party. Despite being engaged for months, they still hadn't celebrated properly. So Mimi, not sure if she'd be able to fly over to Japan for their actual wedding, was holding a party in their honour. All Digi-Destineds invited.

It was a rather stressful day. Davis looked world-weary and depressed, his usually outgoing demeanour oddly muted. Joe was just back from his cruise, sunburnt to crimson, recounting for anyone who stood still long enough the story of how he asked Amelia to marry him. It was a cute tale, but rather tragic - he got seasick halfway through propositioning her. Izzy and Tai were on the phone half the time due to a crisis at work. TK and Kari spent every available moment locked at the lips. Mimi knew she shouldn't care, but honestly, it made her jealous.

But worst of all, Matt was sitting with Sora. With his hand on her knee. On Mimi's own couch. It should have been the ultimate betrayal. But it couldn't be. It gave Mimi the saddest sinking feeling in her chest. If only things could have been different. If only… she lived her life in 'if only'. Always wishing for something better. And it was all Sora's fault! Mimi would very much have liked to go over and hit that smug little redhead right across the face.

Kari must have been picking up on the tension when she'd picked an empty champagne bottle up off the floor. She stared at it reminiscently for a moment before addressing the rest of the guests.

"Do you remember when we were teenagers, and we used to…"

"Save the world?" Joe queried across her.

Kari smiled wryly. "Not what I was going to say, Joe. But astonishingly, yes, I do remember that."

"What were you going to say then?" asked Davis, ready as ever to hang on her every word.

"I was going to say, do you remember when we were teenagers, and we used to have those parties? And we'd play -" She gave the champagne bottle a little shake. "Spin the bottle?"

Mimi remembered. They would always organise one of their parties for her when she was in town. They were typical teenage events, she supposed. Junk food and soda and movies and silly games like spin the bottle. As they got older, occasionally someone - Matt, for the most part - would even commandeer some alcohol, and they would spike their own punch. It wasn't allowed to be fun if they weren't tipsy. And the tipsier they were, the more fun they could have. The tipsier they were, the wilder and raunchier the games would be. The first time Sora took her hands to Tai was in a game like this…

"Anyway," continued Kari. "Does anyone else want to revisit our youth? Give this old bottle one last spin?"

Most of the group just looked at her for a long moment. This was her _engagement party_, and she wanted to run the risk of kissing someone else? But Kari had a mischievous look in her eyes that she'd never had as a child.

"Come on, guys! We're not _that_ grown up!"

"But Kari," Ken began hesitantly, wrapping his arm protectively around Yolei. "Most of us are in relationships..."

Yolei elbowed him in the stomach. "Ken, you are such a spoilsport. That's what makes it fun!"

And so the game had begun. It was amusing to Mimi to see how easily they slipped back into the habits of their youth. Sitting in a circle, the bottle lying on its side on the coffee table. Mimi watched the beginnings of the game with a detached air. She was getting just the tiniest bit bored. She'd rather be with Matt. It was as if her world had shrunk to just the two of them, and no matter who she was with, she would rather be with Matt.

She was half watching the game and half remembering the last time she had been with Matt when Tai had reached out to take the bottle. With a flick of his wrist, the bottle span on its axis. Around and around it went, until Mimi was mildly shocked to see the mouth of the bottle pointed at her. She turned to look at Tai, who was approaching. He winked as he leaned in. it was habit more than anything else that made her tilt her head upwards.

Matt hadn't been paying much attention to the game either, prior to Tai's spin. He'd been thinking how beautiful Mimi looked. How smooth and flawless her skin was. How full and luscious her lips were. How shiny and buoyant her hair was. Less innocently, he'd been thinking about how her blue halter-neck top displayed her creamy cleavage. And how when she bent over, her low-slung black pants flashed her lacy red thong. God, how he wanted to touch her. Feel her lips on his body. Drink in her very essence. How could he sit here next to Sora?

But the moment Tai's lips touched Mimi's, he snapped out of his reverie. Letting out an angry strangled cry, he lunged forward like a coiled snake striking at its prey. Crashing hard into the table, he sent plates and glasses skittering noisily. As he looked up, he was confronted with ten stunned expressions. And one Mimi, who was gritting her teeth and mouthing, _"Are. You. INSANE?"_

Cursing mentally, Matt gave a weak apologetic smile and grabbed the nearest empty bowl he could see. Displaying it, he made his excuses.

"Ha-ha… no dip left, see? You know how I get when there's no dip for my chips…"

Mimi, ever the actress, recovered quickly. While everybody else still looked dazed, she flashed them her most charming grin. Turning to face Matt, she used her most falsely sweet voice. Though she was keeping the quake of anger out of her tone, her hands were balled into white-knuckled fists and Matt knew he was going to be in so much trouble.

"Well, Matt, if you wanted more dip you should have just said something. No need for such a fuss. Just follow me into the kitchen and we'll get you a top up."

As soon as they'd entered the solitude of Mimi's kitchen, she'd turned to him. Fiery anger lit up her eyes.

"What was _that_?" she hissed, her voice shaking dangerously. She was only whispering, but every word made Matt cringe in fear. "Are you _completely crazy_? Don't you think people might notice you jumping over my coffee table and down Tai's throat?"

Matt had the grace to hang his head in shame. Mimi ripped open the fridge door and foraged furiously. Finding the dip, she slammed the door shut and began to spoon it roughly into its ceramic bowl. Thrusting it at Matt, she continued to chew him out.

"FIRST, it was only a kiss. Less than that! It was a kiss in a _teenager's game_. It meant nothing. SECOND, don't you see how something like that could give us away? And over something so insignificant! We have so much to lose, Matt, how could you be so frivolous? So uncontrolled?"

She glared at Matt expectantly.

"I'm sorry, Mi." He replied softly, giving her his most apologetic face. "I'm a jealous man. I just care about you so much, I couldn't stop myself. I didn't even realise I was doing anything until I'd done it."

This mollified her slightly, and her tone was gentler when she spoke again.

"Matt, we are having an affair. Affairs are secret, subversive and sneaky. The general public is not supposed to know. I can't lose you, especially not over something like this."

Matt nodded. Kissing Mimi softly on the lips, they both walked back out to the group and rejoined the game.

Matt had thought that the incident had been completely forgotten. Of course, he'd been wrong. He was sitting in the driver's seat on the ride home, and Sora in the passenger seat next to him was looking like she had something weighing on her mind. Inevitably, she soon spoke up. Sora didn't keep quiet very well.

"What's between you and Mimi?" she asked.

Matt blinked twice. But, to his credit, he showed not even a little hesitation. "We're trying for friendship."

Sora digested this for a moment. When she spoke again, her suspicious tone was lightly veiled as curious banter. Matt could see right through it, though he kept up the pretence of innocent conversation.

"There always seems to be a kind of tension between the two of you."

_Yes. Of the sexual variety._ Matt suppressed a laugh as he pretended to think it over.

"Well… we do have a lot of bad blood between us. It can't all be water under the bridge, Sora."

Sora seemed placated by this, at least for the time being. But Matt couldn't help wondering how much she knew. And couldn't help but get the feeling that there was something big going on, and Sora was behind it all.

* * *

Okay. I know it seems like a filler chapter. But I felt like I was making Matt and Mimi's affair all roses, and I thought I should make a chapter focussing on the downside.

_Emma's useless facts about nothing in particular_

A one kilogram packet of sugar will have about five million grains of sugar.


	13. Anger Fuelled by Romance

LE EGADS! I am actually updating! Still, it's only been a month. That's pretty damn good for me!

**Anger Fuelled by Romance**

* * *

Mimi and Matt were between the sheets again. Sora was playing tennis for some charity benefit, and would be gone for the whole weekend. So both Matt and Mimi thought it would be the ideal opportunity for Jamie and Mimi to stay the night at the Ishida mansion.

Truth be told, they didn't have sex all that often anymore. At first this concerned Mimi - was he growing bored of her already? But the more she examined the situation, the more she realised that this was not so. It wasn't that their passion was dwindling; it was that it was evolving. When their relationship had started there had been a sense of urgency; they had to make up for lost time. But now everything felt far more casual. There seemed to be all the time in the world, even though both knew that there wasn't. They could watch movies or play with their children or just lie together on the sofa. So long as they could cast those meaningful little looks at one another, and occasionally reach out just to make sure the other was there, they were happy.

The only reason they were sharing Matt's bed this time around was because it seemed fitting. Isn't that what normal couples did, lying in bed before going to sleep? And then again first thing the next morning?

They had just finished, and were lying nestled together like spoons. Matt's arm was draped lazily over Mimi's naked waist. His hand brushed across her belly-button, fingers surprised to feel the bar piercing still there. More than anything else, he was ashamed not to have noticed it any of the many other times they had made love over the past weeks. Though, he justified mentally, it wasn't as if they'd had a lot of time to go exploring for such things.

He remembered the day she'd got it. She'd been sixteen, visiting from the United States. He'd dared her. She'd accepted, on the condition that he get something pierced too. Matt had always suspected that Princess Mimi had a streak of wild child in her, and that he gave her the boldness to bring it out. They had always wound each other up; kept things between them fiery, passionate. All Sora did was cool things down.

Matt still had the stud through his eyebrow. He thought it suited his rock star look. But he didn't understand why Mimi still had hers. Not when she'd denounced everything that reminded her of their time together, and especially not when she had been pregnant.

He pressed his lips to the silken skin where her neck joined her shoulders.

"You still have the piercing. That's kind of sexy."

"Mmm," she murmured sleepily. "It was hell when I was pregnant with Jamie."

"So why'd you keep it?" he asked, trailing kisses down her arm.

"To remind me of the stupid things people do."

Mimi felt Matt's forehead press down dejectedly on her bare upper arm.

"What we had wasn't stupid, was it?"

Mimi thought for a moment before flipping around to grin at him. "No… it also looks pretty hot."

Matt smiled, sliding up the bed so that he was sitting with his back against the headboard.

"Well, Mimi, I've been giving this a lot of thought…" he began his speech hesitantly, knowing how important it was for him to find the right words. "And I think that you'll agree with me saying that what we've got is very special. Some people spend a lifetime looking for a love like ours. And yet somehow, miraculously, we've both stumbled upon it. And I don't see how we can both keep ignoring this. I know you've had your doubts, but this is our very _happiness_ we're talking about. And with that in mind… Mimi, will you marry me?"

Mimi tumbled backwards out of the bed. Pulling down the bedspread to cover herself, she scrambled to stand.

"But… but you're already married!"

Matt nodded as he pushed himself out of bed, not bothering to cover his nudity.

"Yes. But Sora and I have never been happy. It would come as a surprise to no one if we were to split up."

He was moving over towards her, but she darted out of the way, picking her short pink dress up off the floor as she did so. She pulled the garment over her head, not bothering to first find her bra or her skimpy lace thong.

"Matt… let's not spoil this…"

Matt threw his hands up in exasperation. "Why is it spoiling anything? Why won't you let me be with the one I love?"

Mimi zipped herself up and gazed at him levelly. "Matt, please. Don't ask me questions that I can't answer. Don't ask for things that I can't give you."

"God, Mimi, why is the idea of us being together so repulsive to you? Why will you give me your body temporarily but never even consider the possibility of a long-term relationship? Why do you think you have to hold out on me?" He paused, his blue eyes kaleidoscopic with mixed emotions of frustration, anger and confusion. "Are you punishing me? Is that what this is?"

Mimi didn't answer. Why was she holding out on him? She had some faint idea about remaining morally superior to Sora. Not stealing her man from under her in the most devious way possible. Not sinking to that kind of level. And while she wanted to explain this to Matt, she knew she couldn't. Not until the right time. But her silence did not seem to help matters. Matt exploded, beating his fist hard into the wall.

"Dammit Mimi! Haven't I suffered enough? Haven't we both suffered enough? What will it take for you to move on? What do I have to do to prove to you that I'm sorry?"

Mimi stared at the man in front of her. She'd thought that she could forgive him. She'd thought that she already had. But maybe she _was_ punishing him. Subconsciously letting him in close, but never close enough, as her way of getting vengeance for the past. She was so confused… she had no idea what she felt anymore.

"Nothing!" she found herself screaming, her voice high-pitched and hysterical. "There's nothing you can do! There's nothing that will make me forget! Not when Jamie cries out for a father that should have been there from the start! There are some wounds that just don't heal, Matt! Some things that cut too close to the bone!"

She closed her mouth abruptly, as if shocked that the words spoken had been coming from her. She loved Matt - she _did_. So why was she saying such hurtful things? Where were they even coming from? Was that honestly how she felt? She'd become so good at hiding her emotions that she'd even been hiding them from herself?

Whatever it was, she suddenly felt oddly lighter. Calmer. As if maybe she might finally be able to move forward with her life. As if maybe she could finally get out of the trap that her painful past had caught her in. As if she'd let go of something that had been pulling her under, weighing her down. As if she'd been drowning, and could now take her first gulps of sweet air.

Matt, on the other hand, was standing as if slapped on the other side of the room. His face was white as a sheet. His hands were shaking badly, and when he spoke, it was in a voice of forced calm.

"I thought you could forgive me, in time. I thought that once the story was out in the open we could move forward; learn to trust each other again. But maybe I was just being foolish. Maybe your reluctance for me to divorce Sora is just because you don't really want to be with me at all. Maybe you're playing me like a fiddle. Maybe… maybe we shouldn't keep doing this."

Mimi's face set in disbelief. "Are you saying what I think you're saying?" she asked in a squeaky voice.

Matt's eyes flickered dangerously. Mimi knew him well enough to know that his tolerance was fast waning.

"Give me a fucking break, Mimi. One second you're hot, the next you're ice cold. I don't know what you want from me, and I don't think you even know what you want from yourself. You're conflicted, confused, always weighing up the pros and cons. I get it. You've been hurt by me before. But a relationship can't work like this. I can't be with you unless you can be with me."

"Well… well if that's how you feel I'd best leave you here and now!"

She'd expected him to stop her. To start apologising effusively; to say that he hadn't meant a single word he'd said. That it had been the heat of the moment causing his irrationality. She hesitated so that he could jump in. But he didn't. So, dying inside, she grabbed what was hers and strode out of the room. And, maybe, out of his life.

* * *

Review if you love me!

_Emma's useless facts about nothing in particular_

In 2001, St. Patrick's Day was banned in Ireland because of the scare caused by foot and mouth disease.


	14. What These Eyes Have Seen

YES, LOYAL READERS, AN UPDATE! Why? BECAUSE I HAVE MANY, MANY ASSESSMENTS TO DO, AND PROCRASTINATION IS MY ONE TRUE LOVE. ALONG WITH CAPSLOCK. Hope you all enjoy it!

**What These Eyes Have Seen**

* * *

Matt watched Mimi leave, unable to stop her. He knew it was partly his fault. He always let his temper get the better of him. He should have said something, but words had failed him. He should have run after her, but his legs had collapsed from beneath him. So all he could do was listen to her slam the door behind her as he sat alone on his unmade bed.

It seemed like no matter what he did, all he'd ever really see of her was her back as she walked away, leaving him behind.

Matt firmly believed that to understand the present and even predict the future; you had to look back to the past. He consequently spent many hours immersed in memories. Some memories were pleasant. He didn't let himself revisit those very often. More often he went back to painful memories. Both to punish himself for being so stupid back then, and to try and prevent anything similar happening in the future.

He remembered well the start of his relationship with Sora. It was maybe a fortnight after he'd turned his back on Mimi and she'd returned to the States. He'd been in his apartment, sitting at his table in three-day-old boxer shorts with a week's worth of stubble and a half-empty bottle of vodka in his hand. The curtains were drawn - he never wanted to see the sun again. How well he could still see the image before him. He'd just about hit rock bottom.

And then there had been a knock on his door. He supposed he must have left it unlocked, because even though he hadn't moved from his seat, Sora had walked in. She'd brought food and tidied up and taken the alcohol away. She'd opened the window and forced him to face the world.

He'd thought she was only there as a friend. He'd thought she was still dating Tai. He'd thought it was safe to spend so much time with her. He'd thought she was only trying to comfort him. And then one night he'd come home from the pub, blind drunk, and she'd been sitting in his living room wearing next to nothing.

And then, somehow, he was beside her. Then naked. Then wrapped in her body there on the couch. She wasn't Mimi - she would never be - but in his fuzzy, heartbroken drunk state, he could pretend. It happened a few times. He would be inebriated. She would be available. The results spoke for themselves. When he was sober, Matt would wonder why she let him use her when it was clear that they were not in love. But he wasn't sober often.

Then one day it had to come crashing down. She'd approached him, and from the look on her face he knew it was big news.

Pregnant.

So there'd been a shotgun wedding. Matt knew what it was like growing up without a parent, and he didn't want that for hid child. And anyway, what did it matter what he did with his life? It had no meaning without Mimi.

But now Mimi was back in his life. He'd do whatever she wanted just to keep her. If only she'd stay with him. He'd planned to divorce Sora; marry Mimi as he'd always said he would. Ben could live with them. Matt figured he could win custody. He was main breadwinner, he'd have a stable family environment, and Ben would have an older half-brother that he adored.

But Mimi didn't want him to get a divorce. For all appearances, she didn't seem to want him at all. He didn't understand. There was no other way for them to move forward. They had no future. Unless she could commit to him, their relationship was nothing more than a passionate spin on the merry-go-round. They could only ever end up where they'd started.

He loved her, but if they couldn't get past this, then maybe they really were better off apart.

Yes, it was a terrible thing to do to Sora. But it was a necessary evil. And Matt had the distinct impression that Sora didn't quite see their marriage as she'd always dreamed, anyway. Matt just couldn't see what Mimi's problem was.

* * *

Mimi felt as if she was on auto-pilot as she found her way down the hall to where Jamie was still asleep. Rousing him, she was deaf to his protests as she practically dragged him out of the house. She piled him into the car and drove off, blind to anything but her own panic. She thought she might be hyperventilating. She thought she might throw up.

_Oh God. Oh God oh God oh GOD. Have I ruined everything?_

She left Jamie at Yolei's. It had only taken Yolei one glance at Mimi's face to know something was very, very wrong, and so she'd taken Jamie in without question. Mimi didn't want him to see her like this. Besides, she knew he'd have fun with Michaela and Reece.

Finding her way back to her car, her heels beat in rhythm with her pounding heart. She sat behind the wheel for a long moment, feeling oddly empty. Her whole boy was aching and she was caught between wanting to cry and not being able to find the tears.

She had to talk to someone. Someone who understood. Yolei was happily married. Mimi couldn't begrudge her that, but she couldn't talk to her either. There was only one person who could properly empathise with her frame of mind. She stomped on the accelerator and sped away from the sidewalk, tears finally beginning to flood down her cheeks.

She arrived at Tai's soon after. He always knew how to make her feel better. It was his day off, so she knew he'd be at home. He had to be there. She didn't know what she'd do if he wasn't. This mess with Matt was getting over her head. Someone needed to tell her that she wasn't going crazy. Someone who knew her had to confirm that this utterly ridiculous dependence on another was only temporary. Tai was the only one who could help.

She found herself outside his apartment door. Wiping the tears and mascara tracks off her face, she leant forward to knock. But just as her knuckles were coming to graze the wooden frame, suddenly every bone in her body told her not to. Lowering her ear to the lock instead, she distinctly heard music playing. Swooping, orchestral and highly romantic. So why was Tai, hard rock addict, playing it? While she knew she should leave, her curiosity won out. Even over her hysterical distress.

She turned the knob quietly. Unlocked. Opening the door just a crack, she saw it was almost completely dark inside. Creeping in, she clicked the door closed behind her. Candles glowed dimly, dotted around the living room and down the hall. There was a vase on the coffee table filled with blood-red roses.

It was plain that Tai was entertaining romantic company. Mimi was suddenly struck by a hot, irrational feeling of betrayal. How _dare_ he find someone? She felt very out of place, and was just about to leave when she heard footsteps. Cursing mentally, she ducked into a shadowy gap between the wall and the electronic entertainment system. When did she get so good at hiding? She felt like a spy. She just had to hope that Tai didn't see her. She thanked her lucky stars that the lighting was so faint. She couldn't lose his friendship on top of everything else.

A voice rang out over the music. "Tai! I'm going to get some wine from the kitchen!"

Then a giggle. But Mimi hardly heard it. The feeling of betrayal had increased a thousand fold. She knew that voice. But it couldn't be… there was just no way. She wouldn't have dared believe it, if Sora hadn't waltzed right out into the living room, completely naked. Mimi's jaw just about hit the floor and she had to stop herself from gasping out loud. Seconds later Tai joined her, also in the buff.

_I didn't need to see that…_

Mimi's mind was racing. They were obviously taking a nude drawing class together. Or something. That had to be it. Anything except… _that_.

Tai meandered up behind Sora and wrapped his arms around her waist. He lowered his lips to play on her bare shoulder. One of his hands rose to cup her breast, the other slid lower. Sora moaned deeply and dug long fingernails into Tai's thigh.

Okay. So maybe they were doing _that_.

But why? _Why?_ Sora was married to Matt! She had gone to all the trouble of stealing him away from Mimi, and certainly wasn't letting him go. And now she was having an affair with Tai? It didn't make sense. How dare she? Selfish, greedy bitch! Mimi was just itching to stride out and slap her smug face.

And Tai. Where did he fit into this puzzle? Had he initiated it? He had promised Mimi at the reunion that everything would work itself out. Had he been planning this since then? Or - she clamped a hand to her mouth - had this been going on since then?

Suddenly Sora's time away seemed to make sense. How she was never at home. Her last minute scheduling of emergency tennis lessons. Her overreaction when her client cancelled. Maybe even why Pachi the housekeeper didn't like her at all. It was all because of Tai.

She had to take a moment to marvel at the odds. What were the chances that both husband and wife were cheating on each other at the exact same time? And both with their childhood flames. It was inconceivable. But really, Mimi thought, possibly the single best scenario. Nobody was left alone. Nobody had to feel guilty about breaking up a marriage, because everyone was as guilty as everyone else. No child was left without two parents to care for it.

Mimi knew she had to tell Matt. No silly fight was as important as this. This was huge, life-altering. She waited until Sora and Tai headed back for the bedroom, shrinking even further into the shadows as they walked right past her. As soon as she heard the headboard if the bed crash against the wall, she knew she was safe to leave.

* * *

Contrived? Hell yes. I'm very sorry but any creativity I've ever had seems to have flown out the window. Plus, I still haven't decided whether I want a happy ending or a sad ending, and this buys me some more time. Anyway, review if you feel like it!

_Emma's useless facts about nothing in particular_

A man named Charles Osborne had the hiccups for approximately sixty-nine years.


	15. A World Of Lies

Finally, I'm updating! I'm so sorry it's taken so long, but my Kingdom Hearts muse has been poking me with a sharp stick, and my Digimon muse has had to go into hiding. Plus I somehow managed to lose the middle of this chapter, both the hard copy and the one on the computer, so I had to piece it together like a jigsaw puzzle. I actually have no idea how that happened…

ANYWAY, please accept this extra long chapter by way of apology.

**A World Of Lies**

-x-

Mimi strode purposefully up to the front door of the Ishida mansion. She'd never been gladder that Matt had given her an electronic key to his front gates. This was a discussion that could most definitely not be had via security intercom. Plus, she had the distinct impression that he'd still be much too angry to let her in. The thought made her quail slightly, but her determination did not waver.

This needed to be done.

She found him in the kitchen. A mug of tea in his hand, he was staring out the window and apparently lost in thought. He'd pulled on a pair of old jeans since she'd left, but had not brushed his hair or shaved. Mimi strongly suspected that he'd been standing in that very place for a long time.

"Matt?" she said tentatively, trying to pull him from his reverie.

He spun around, shock stamped across his face. Shock that was quickly masked with cool anger and a bitter tone.

"Mimi. I thought I made it clear that I needed some time to be alone. To think about things. And besides, Sora will be home soon and we both know how little you want her to know about us."

Mimi felt a white-hot surge of frustration at his tone. She was trying to help him - to change their lives - and he was being petulant. But it was soon replaced with a feeling of overwhelming unease. How was she meant to say this?

"That's… why I'm here. About Sora…"

"What about her?" he snapped, his tone betraying more than just a hint of impatience.

"She's… um…" Mimi hesitated. Breaking this news was impossible. How could anyone ever want to hear it? It rang through her with a sort of twisted irony that he had been through the exact same speech before, but the two key players had switched roles. "… Maybe you should sit down."

Something about her uncertainty struck a chord with him. Maintaining a look of scepticism, he fell silently into a chair at his kitchen table. Twisting her hands together for a minute, she slid in across from him. She looked at him, waiting expectantly, but couldn't let herself linger. She could get lost in his face for hours. Staring at her hands, in the end she just had to blurt it out.

"She's cheating on you!"

Matt threw his head back and laughed openly, before settling his gaze on Mimi's white face.

"Please, Mimi. She's _what_?"

"Cheating on you!" Mimi's pitch had raised an octave or so when she'd realised that he didn't believe her. She was on the edge of hysteria. This was hard enough without having to fight him over it. "She is! She's sleeping with Tai! I was just at his apartment. I… saw."

Matt was halfway through rolling his eyes in disbelief when he really saw what was before him. Mimi was chalk-white, almost trembling, her face drawn in concern. How could she fake that? And why would she lie? In all their time together she'd never been anything but brutally honest with him.

"She's… cheating on me?" he asked softly, so wanting to disbelieve. This was not something that got easier with practice.

Mimi didn't know what to do. She wanted to take him in her arms and hold him like a child until the pain went away, but knew instinctively that it wasn't the right thing to do. Instead she stayed silent, waiting. Waiting for him to speak. Waiting for him to move. Waiting for anything.

What broke the moment was really not what she had expected. The noise of the front door opening and shutting. Fast-paced footsteps that seemed to approach with a sort of jaunty buoyancy. It could only be Sora. Matt's eyes registered the sound, and he stood suddenly. His chair clattered backwards across the tile floor as he marched away from it. Mimi followed at a nervous distance, wavering at the archway between the kitchen and the living room.

"So. Did you have a good time at the benefit?" he asked. He was still dazed, the words bubbling out of his mouth seeming so far away. An eternity away.

Sora had a serene smile floating over her face. She was perfectly oblivious to the changed man before her.

"Yes, actually. It was quite lovely…"

Mimi couldn't stand it. The lies, the deception, the pain - it had to end. Abandoning the sidelines and bracing herself for inevitable conflict, she leapt into the fray. Sora started, the smile sliding from her face. She was naturally shocked to see Mimi in her house. Mimi was glad - she'd need the element of surprise to force a confession.

"Cut the crap, Sora. You weren't at any benefit. You were with Tai."

Sora blinked for just a moment too long before scoffing.

"I don't know where you get your information, but I'm quite sure that today I was at a benefit, playing tennis for charity…"

"Don't lie to me, Sora!" Mimi yelled, her fists balling together. She had to get a confession - she just _had_ to. Otherwise this would never be over. "I've seen the two of you together! You can't hide it! You're cheating on Matt, and we both know it!"

Sora looked like she was about to deny, deny, deny. The look of panic on her face was so hastily smothered it might never have been there at all. Mimi was about to launch into a tirade, when Matt cut across, his voice quiet and almost sad.

"Please, Sora. Why?"

Somehow, at that second, Sora knew she was caught. She sighed, broken, and looked away. When she spoke, it was slowly, as if she was weighing up every word. As if she were trying to decide what parts of the truth she had to tell, and what she could still conceal.

"Tai had TJ at the tennis camp I taught at - the one just after the reunion. I swear we'd never even considered a relationship before then! I was faithful to you! But we were in such close contact every day! And I still had a certain affection for him… we started talking and something rekindled. It wasn't planned, I swear!"

She looked earnestly up at Matt, making sure he was taking in what she said before she continued.

"You and me… I'm sure you'll agree that we were never originally meant to go this far. Our relationship started when Tai and I were in a really rocky place. I thought we'd never get through it. I thought I loved him, but I could never be sure if he loved me. And besides, I've never been able to trust my feelings. So I turned to you, Matt, trying to make Tai jealous, trying to find out how he really felt about me. But we weren't careful. I fell pregnant, and then we had to marry. But I never stopped caring for Tai. And that… that was why I cheated on you. I'm so sorry. It shouldn't have come to that."

Matt had the look of a child trying to complete a difficult puzzle. Trying to make all the pieces fit, while blissful understanding danced just beyond his fingertips.

"So why didn't you just divorce me?"

Sora's eyes flickered nervously, refusing to stand still as she answered. "I couldn't bear to see my son the unwitting victim of his parent's mistakes. Our stupidity… our carelessness… it is not his fault."

Mimi saw Matt slowly turning that over in his mind. She knew it would ring true with him. Hell, it was his own rationale. His own words, just dressed up a little differently. So, before Matt could answer, she once again jumped into battle.

"You know, Sora, that sounds almost plausible. But I feel like we've skipped through history just a little too fast to catch all the details. For example, there was that time that you told Matt that I was cheating on him with Michael, and that Jamie was Michael's baby, when I told you before _anyone else_ that I was carrying _Matt's_ child! You knew! You knew and you can't deny it, and still you deliberately set out to sabotage our relationship! You knew how I felt about him, you nasty selfish bitch!"

The words had bubbled up and out like bile. Once they'd started, she couldn't stop them. And before Mimi even realised that she'd moved, her palm had struck Sora's cheek. The impact rang across the room, leaving her skin tingling and hot. She drew back to see Sora's face suddenly set in a shocked expression of horror and disbelief. First it went stark white, then drew colour until her whole face was as purple as the palm print Mimi had left. When Sora spoke, it was venomous - strung with fury and dripping with spite.

"I wanted to win for once! You were never there and Matt deserved better! He was going to be a rock star, and why should you get the honour of being on his arm when I was right there and you weren't? I liked the idea of being his famous girlfriend… and even wife! I admit it! All through our lives you came out on top. You were the pretty one, the talented one, the one every last fucking person loved. You didn't earn it! You didn't deserve it! I wanted what you had! I wanted the one that loved you the most!"

"And what about Tai?" asked Mimi coldly. "Where did he fit into this? Did you just think you were entitled to play with them both?"

"At the time, Tai was working as a lowly soccer coach. He wasn't earning enough to support himself. Yes, I love him. I'll always love him. But love isn't enough!"

Mimi had every intention of slapping Sora again, when she felt something behind her. She stepped backwards, uncertain for the first time, moving so that she could see Matt. Cold anger was radiating almost visibly from every pore.

"You used me," he stated.

Sora seemed to sense the inherent danger in his voice.

"No, no!" she back-pedalled frantically, finally regaining control of herself. But the damage was done.

"Was it your _goal_ to ruin my life, or did you just not care if you did?" he continued, his voice quivering with tangible fury.

"No! Of course not! Matt, please! It wasn't planned like that! Please -"

He cut her off, and she winced. Mimi imagined she could feel every one of his words cut through her like a knife.

"How can I believe you? You used me for some sick game you had going. I was nothing more than a puppet in your goddamn insecure play. Not only did you taint your own love, you destroyed someone else's! How could you do something like this? I thought I knew you! How can I ever trust you again?"

Everything had set in, finally. All the facts. Every accusation proven. And yet, Mimi was not sure if she'd achieved what she wanted. She watched the two of them with an air of increased understanding. This wasn't over. It was a long, long way from being over. Even if Matt didn't love Sora, he was still hurt by what she'd done. They had been friends, and he couldn't just lock her out of his life the way Mimi had. They had a child together. This process was nowhere near as simple as it had first seemed.

There were knots to be untied that Mimi had been completely blind to. And, she finally fully realised, starting an official relationship with her was one of those knots. Custody battles loomed. Fighting over possessions, paying through the nose for lawyer after lawyer. They would only be harder if she was there too. Plus, Matt was a rock star. He was in the public eye all the time. This whole scene was bound to generate hugely negative publicity for his band. Mimi never wanted to be a burden on his life.

She'd been stupid to assume that everything could be smooth sailing from now on. Life never worked like that. Each of them had issues to work through. She herself had a whole life on the other side of the world that she had completely neglected for months. She had loose ends to tie up too. And maybe it was better to do it alone.

So, while Sora stood with her head bowed and Matt had his head in his hands, she slipped silently away.

-x-

_Emma's useless facts about nothing in particular_

There are 2,598,960 five card hands possible in a 52-card deck.


	16. Playing For Keeps

I'm so sorry it's taken so long. My Kingdom Hearts muse is _still_ poking me with that stick, but now there's also my Final Fantasy muse pulling on my skirt and my Supernatural muse gnawing demonically on my arm.

I really need to stop being seduced by shiny new fandoms.

Anyway, I've recently breached the 10,000 hits mark for this fic, and I just wanted to say thank you. It means a lot that you enjoy it that much, and that you've stayed with me for all this time. And on that note, I think this will be the penultimate chapter. So, please enjoy it!

**Playing For Keeps**

* * *

Maybe a week passed. Sora moved out quietly, with a tiny suitcase and the plan to spend at least a little while in Tai's bachelor pad. Ben would be staying with Matt until something more permanent could be sorted out.

Matt didn't leave his home. He couldn't pretend that everything that had happened didn't affect him. Betrayal, heartache, lawyer after lawyer. So many times in his life everything had been thrown in to chaos and left to settle in disarray. So many times he'd had to reinvent himself. He didn't know how much longer he could do it.

But when Ben entered the dark bedroom that had become Matt's cocoon and shyly mentioned that there were no Coco Pops left, Matt knew he had to get up. He would go and get breakfast for his son, and then he would go and see Mimi. It had suddenly become clear to him that Mimi hadn't even tried to call him since the confrontation with Sora. She'd just faded into the wind. And that had probably been his fault. He'd find her and made up for it and then, together, they would be okay.

* * *

Jamie pressed his face into the back of Mimi's knees before peering around them to see what she was doing. There were suitcases - _lots_ of suitcases - and all of his favourite things were disappearing into them. His velcro shoes and his building blocks and his movies and his _train_! It was at that moment that he knew he had to put a stop to this madness.

"What are you doing, Mummy?"

Mimi paused, turning to face her son as she tucked a stray strand of hair back behind her ear. There was no easy way to say this.

"Packing, honey. We're going home."

Jamie folded his tiny arms. "But Mummy," he said, with the slow and superior voice of someone trying to explain something very simple to someone very stupid. "We _are_ home."

Great. She was being patronised by her three-year-old son. She bent down to talk to him on level.

"No, no, sweets. Our real home. Overseas. In America."

She smiled, hoping to get one in return. She needed him to be happy about this. Even if he couldn't possibly understand why, she needed to leave. She couldn't stay here and just one tiny little smile from him would tell her that he was okay with that.

She was sorely disappointed. His face crumpled.

"But Mummy!" he cried. "Don't wanna leave! Don't _like_ it there! Wanna stay _here_!"

Desperation was starting to creep in around the corners of her consciousness, fixing her smile and tightening her voice.

"We can't, honey. Mummy has things she needs to do back home. We have to go back."

His face cleared immediately. Relief flooded her so fast she thought she might faint. Thank God. But the sweet feeling only lasted a moment, because when he spoke everything crumbled down around her.

"Oh. Well. Mummy, you can go back and I'll stay with Ben! You can pick me up when you're done!"

Mimi gaped. Where did her son learn to bargain like that? When did he decide that he'd rather be with Ben - and Matt - than with her? Was it all her fault for leaving the boys alone so much when she and Matt were together? Didn't he need her anymore? It was amazing that no matter how many times a heart broke, it could still break again.

She was about to reply, to try and reason with something as implicitly unreasonable as the child of Mimi Tachikawa and Matt Ishida, when there was a knock on the door.

Eye to the peephole and - _oh, why now?_ - it was Matt with Ben in tow. She wished she could ignore them, but Jamie was pulling on her skirt, so excited about visitors, and even if she could say no to him, it would only mean going back to their argument. So she unlatched the door.

Matt stepped in and gently ruffled Jamie's hair as he was enveloped in a knee-crushing hug. Then Jamie and Ben ran off to co-conspire, and Matt was left with Mimi. Who was feeling extremely nervous about the obvious state of moving that her home was in. And Matt didn't fail to pick up on it. Eyes falling on the open luggage, and the carefully bubble-wrapped household items, he exploded.

"Where the _fuck_ do you think you're going?"

Mimi's eyes flicked automatically to the doorway Jamie and Ben had run through, making sure they weren't listening to this. She didn't want them getting hurt, or blaming themselves for the fight, and she _definitely_ didn't want some of Matt's vocabulary repeated at playgroup.

"Back to the States," she replied in significantly more hushed tones. "Where my life is."

For a long moment, Matt could only gape at her. Questions reeled through his mind, moving too fast for him to grab on to any one in particular. How could this be happening? Why would she do this now? What would have happened if he'd stayed in bed for just a couple more days? He could have missed her completely, been left behind yet again.

"When did you decide this?" he eventually managed.

"About a week ago."

Her glance met his, and he understood. 'About a week ago' meant 'after that scene in your living room'. He took a deep breath and tried to settle himself. He had to ask the important questions. He had to find the right answers. He had to find a way to change her mind.

"What's for you in America? Why can't you stay?"

His direct approach put Mimi on the back foot. "My family, for one thing," she said defensively. "My job, for another. My home. I think that's three for three, isn't it?"

"You never speak to your family," Matt countered instantly. "Your job isn't what you want, and you have a _home_ here."

"My job isn't perfect," Mimi said, choosing to focus on that small part of what Matt had said. The rest rang too true, had roots too deep to argue. "But what is? And it's all I have."

"I have friends in high places, Mi. Agents and producers and casting directors." Matt took her by the hand. "Stay, and take a chance on your dream."

Mimi gaped at him, before drawing her hand away and shaking her head furiously. "No. No! What do you want, for me to just let go of everything else? Throw caution to the wind? There are consequences for our actions, Matt, and you should know that better than anyone. Sometimes we have to do what is in our long-term best interests, not go out on a whim that we'll regret later."

"All great things involve great risk."

"Maybe I can't afford to take a risk. Maybe I had to give up on that dream a long time ago. It's just not practical. I'm not a wide-eyed teen anymore. I know how the world works. I know the chances of me becoming a superstar are slim to nil. And what would happen to Jamie if I crashed and burned? What if I was left with no money and my dreams crumpled around my feet yet again? I don't think I could just bounce back again."

Matt placed a steadying hand on her shoulder. "I'd support you. No matter what, I'd be there."

"You've said that before. I can't pin everything on you."

It was stated as fact, without malice or anger. And that hurt more than anything. Matt winced, withdrawing his hand to drag it through his shaggy blonde hair.

"So you're just going to leave, then? Leave your friends, your dreams? Me? I love you, Mimi. More than I have ever loved anyone. Why does it have to be this way?"

Mimi looked at him. He was the most beautiful man she had ever met. For all his flaws – and they were numerous – he was the love of her life. The way she felt when he was smiling at her, kissing her, moving inside her… she'd never find that again. But sometimes love was just not enough.

"Don't make this about us."

Matt's eyes glinted furiously. "But this _is_ about us. We've finally got the chance to make this work, and you run away."

Mimi sighed. "We're part of two different worlds now, Matt. Can't you see that?

"I don't want to see that. I refuse to see that!"

"And that is precisely your problem, Matt. Maybe we were never meant to be together. Maybe that's why our relationship has hit every conceivable obstacle, and then some. Maybe our paths take us in different directions. Did you ever think about that possibility?"

"Thought about it?" Matt spat, voice suddenly harsh. "You're kidding. I tried to persuade myself of it every fucking night I spent with Sora. Don't you dare use that destiny bullshit on me. I don't believe it. We make our own destinies. It is our choices that define us."

"Yeah?" For the first time, her voice wobbled and the cracks started to show. "Well what happens when you make the wrong choice? When instead of following basic common sense you let yourself get carried away and ultimately broken?"

Matt reached forward, cupped her face gently in his hands. Drawing her in closer, he felt her tremble. He knew Mimi, probably better than anyone. He knew that when she had an idea in her head, almost nothing would change her mind. But he also knew that she loved him, just as much as he loved her. And he was not going to lose her again, and if he had to prey on that vulnerability then that's what he was going to do. He looked down as he absently stroked her cheek with his thumb. God, he couldn't let her leave.

When he spoke, his tone was low, beguiling. He was playing for everything, and he wasn't going to lose.

"Was the way it felt holding each other _wrong_? Are the feelings we have for each other _wrong_? If so, then by all means, get on your plane and fly out of my life. But if you love me and you know it's the only sure thing in your life, then…" he looked at her directly, the blue of his eyes flashing with the promise of a challenge. "Then you have to stay."

* * *

The end! Just kidding. But it's coming up shortly! As soon as I figure out what I want it to be, that is.

Anyway, please review. I love reviews. They validate my existence!

_Emma's useless facts about nothing in particular_

The longest chapter of the Bible is Psalm 119.


	17. Without Saying Goodbye

Three and a half years ago, I started writing this story. It hasn't always gone the way I originally thought it would, but today it finally reaches its end. I'm not sure if I like the way this final chapter works – I'm half there and half not – but I guess I'll see what you all think. So, enjoy!

**Without Saying Goodbye**

* * *

Yolei poured two bowls of cereal for her older children before sitting down to feed her youngest. Michaela and Reece dashed in, grabbed their breakfast, and ran back to eat it in front of the television, leaving Yolei alone with her husband and the baby. Watching closely as Erin drank from her bottle, she mused aloud across the kitchen table.

"I can't believe Mimi went back to America. I mean, what's for her over there? Sure, she's got her job, but all of her _friends_ are here."

Ken concentrated on buttering his toast. "Mmm," he replied noncommittally. He loved his wife dearly, but she got too caught up in other people's business. What Mimi did with her life was none of their concern.

Not one to be dissuaded, Yolei continued. "_And_ she said she was seeing someone here. I thought she was finally settling down. We could have had another wedding!"

Taking a measured sip of orange juice, Ken gazed levelly across the kitchen table. "I guess they must have ended it."

Yolei, seeing that Erin had finished, shifted to burp her. She sighed as she did so, saddened by all her friend had gone through. First there was the drama with Matt, then she'd had to raise a child all on her own, and now she'd lost this chance at romance. It was all so tragic.

"Yeah," she answered. "I guess they must have."

* * *

"Ken told me that Mimi's gone back to the States."

Kari and TK were on the train, sitting next to one another on their way in to uni. His hand rested on her thigh in an instinctive show of possession, and hers twined in with it, engagement ring glittering in the muted light.

"I hope your brother didn't have anything to do with it."

Chewing on his lower lip, TK replied. "Me too. But it seemed like they were getting along, don't you think? They behaved at our engagement party…"

Kari smiled. She knew that TK had always had a soft spot for Mimi, and that there had been a time when he'd hoped she would become a member of his family. In fact, though he tried to hide it, Kari strongly suspected that a small part of her fiancé still hoped for a reconciliation between Matt and Mimi.

Of course, he had always been defined by his hope.

"I suppose so," she eventually answered. "Mimi didn't try to poison his food, at any rate."

"Do you think she'll come to our wedding?" TK asked, eyes wide and struck with a sudden uncertainty.

"I'm sure she will." Kari comforted him with a squeeze of her hand. "She wouldn't miss it."

TK turned to stare out the window, tapping a thoughtful rhythm against the floor with his toes, and a playful grin crossed Kari's face. She leant in close, so that when she spoke her lips brushed across his cheek like an unformed kiss.

"The real problem will be keeping me from leaving you at the altar and running off with Davis."

TK whipped around, dismay colouring his features as Kari laughed at his response. "Not funny, Kari!"

* * *

"Kari says that Mimi's gone back to New York."

Sora looked up from her magazine as Tai crossed the room to hand her a cup of coffee. She sipped the cappuccino, staying resolutely silent and tucking her knees up close to her chest as she refused to meet Tai's pointed gaze. Sighing, Tai flopped down onto the couch next to her.

"Sora," he began tentatively. "You know I love you. And I forgive you for whatever you've done. But Mimi… she's my friend. She used to be your _best_ friend. And she didn't deserve what you did to her. To all of us."

Sora didn't reply, her eyes instead locked on a spot on the page before her.

"Please, Sora. This is not who you really are." He placed a pleading hand on her knee. "You made a mistake. But for the sake of our relationship, and your relationship with everyone else, please, _please_ try to make this right."

* * *

Matt lay in his bed and he thought about consequences. Good and bad, his life was built on consequences. Every relationship that had failed and every relationship that had succeeded. All that he was ashamed of and all that he prided. All his memories and his regrets and his joys and his miseries… they were what made him.

He was still contemplating this when his train of thought was derailed by a sudden voice from his bedroom door.

"I found the champagne. By the way, your kitchen is a disgrace."

He couldn't stop the grin from pulling at his lips as Mimi sashayed in, carrying a bottle of sparkling wine and two glasses. He gazed up at her, so real with her messy hair and swollen lips and her lithe figure wrapped up in a satin nightgown. She'd stayed. He'd needed her and she'd stayed and how could he _not_ smile when he was the happiest he'd been in years?

"I'm so glad you told Yolei that you were going back to the States. I want you to myself for a while."

Mimi looked at the man lying naked before her; watched an uncontrollable smile spread over his features. This man, the only man she'd ever loved enough to let him break her heart. This man, with his easy good looks and the eyes that told their story right up until the happy ending. This man, who had convinced her that there was no place left to be but in his arms.

"You know, we'll have to tell them eventually. And I _will_ have to go back to the States to sort everything out. This isn'tgoing to be as simple as you seem to think…" she paused halfway through her thought, looking down at the champagne in her hands before setting it on the bedside table. She smiled, and reached for the knot holding her gown together. "But we can talk about that later, I suppose. For now…"

Allowing the garment to puddle at the floor, she crawled into the bed and snuggled up to Matt's warm, hard-muscled body.

"I love you," he murmured into her hair. "Don't ever leave."

She clutched him harder, rubbing the smooth of her cheek against the ridge of his collarbone.

"I won't. I love you, too."

* * *

THE END. Roll credits! I just want to give special mention to anybody who has reviewed this fic (and anyone who reviews it now, hint hint) because without your feedback I probably would never have found the motivation to keep writing after three long years. So, thank you.

_Emma's useless facts about nothing in particular_

The statuette on Rolls Royces is called The Spirit of Ecstasy.


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